Does your SO suffer from SID: Sports-Induced Depression?

bellafleur · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:37 AM

I love my boyfriend so much, and he loves me back, and our relationship is wonderful. However, nothing compares to his insatiable, inexplicable, obsessive love of sports. I don't consider this a problem per se, because we really don't have any big problems. I'm just trying to figure out if this is normal...

He is absolutely addicted to sports, which I think is pretty normal. There isn't a time of year where he isn't glued to the tv/sports blogs following up to the minute updates on baseball/soccer/football/basketball. He lives and dies for how his favorite teams fare. I would dare say that he loves sports more than I love handbags and fashion, which is quite a feat!

What's happening now is that his favorite baseball team just got swept in the playoffs, and I swear he is clinically depressed over it. He's been moping around the house all day, irritated at everything, emotionally eating the whole pan of brownies, etc. It wouldn't worry me if it were just one day, but he's been like this since the first game they lost. And I've seen him go through it for a week when his favorite basketball team lost in the playoffs earlier this year. And when his favorite soccer team didn't make it to the champions league. I have verified with my male co-workers that sports-induced depression is real. One of them said the last time his favorite team blew a playoffs race, he could barely bring himself to get out of bed for two weeks!

My boyfriend is a wonderful person, and is happy and cheerful a majority of the time. Nothing I do ever upsets him like this. I just find it so strange and mysterious... I mean, if I was bidding on my HG handbag, and lost it at the last second to a sniper, maybe I'd be upset. For like, an hour. Then I'd just find something else to shop for! The only thing I could seriously see myself getting this depressed about would be something that actually happened to ME personally, like losing a job or a pet or something. But sports??

Does anyone else's SO go through this? If any guys are reading this, do you suffer from SID? (I have decided Sports-Induced Depression deserves an acronym:) What are we women supposed to do to cheer you up? Bake for you, get you in the bedroom, make you watch Disney movies, what? Or do you just need to be avoided and left alone until the next sport catches your interest? Ladies, how do you deal with your SO's when it seems their world is about to end... over a GAME where other men wear tight pants and slap each other on the rear??:)

leothelnss · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:40 AM

I think the only thing men love more than sports is sex.. I'll leave it at that

killerstrawbery · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:55 AM

awwww ur so sweet! i would just disconnect all the comps and tv's and force him to stop sports altogether

lol, i cant stand guys into sports

ShelleyBaby · Oct 6th, 2008, 02:05 AM

That's a bit extreme. It's only a sport! I really don't think that is normal or healthy behaviour at all. Maybe he should go and see someone about it. :|

nooch · Oct 6th, 2008, 02:27 AM

I was going to say yes, and I do too but I've never been unable to get out of bed after the Yankees screw up. And I am still not over the 1995 Division Series.

Also, if he's a Cubs fan - this is a little more understandable. Not to turn this into a sports thread... but people have been born, lived long healthy and productive lives and died since the Cubs won anything. He might feel like this is his last chance to see his team's and therefore his dream come true.

To a lot of people (not just men) sports are nearly a religious love.

Junkenpo · Oct 6th, 2008, 03:09 AM

^^ ditto.

Not to demean or take anything away from anyone's beliefs or religion, but my ex-BF counted certain sports equal to his love for me. (please note the fact he is EX-bf, lol!)

Watching said sport was "going to church" so we couldn't do anything on those days. "Can't. I'll be at church," was his reply. Which meant he'd be parked in front of his tv, hypnotized all day.

And I'll always remember the day my bday coincided with the Superbowl. *sigh* I got no attention that day & no apologies, either!

Laurie8504 · Oct 6th, 2008, 05:55 AM

Hmm, this does seem a bit unhealthy. Maybe time for an intervention?

My SO was a professional athlete, so he is understandably a little sports-obsessed. But just with that one sport. Which fortunately is only on tv for about 2 to 4 weeks a year.

But to have an emotional breakdown over it is really extreme, is there anything else your husband enjoys that could serve as a distraction? Get him out of the house! Go bike riding, take a cooking class, work out (endorphins), or better yet, just go play sports instead of watching them.

jellybebe · Oct 6th, 2008, 07:44 AM

This is exactly why my bf doesn't watch sports in any sort of religious fashion - he knows how depressing/disappointing it can be when his teams lose! However, I think a lot of men do watch tons of sports and thus get sad/angry when their teams lose. See the original "Fever Pitch" starring Colin Firth for an example!

twinkle.tink · Oct 6th, 2008, 11:18 AM

My husband goes through this, but I can't fault him....so do I.

Just give him time, he'll get over it.

bellafleur · Oct 6th, 2008, 11:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nooch

I was going to say yes, and I do too but I've never been unable to get out of bed after the Yankees screw up. And I am still not over the 1995 Division Series.

Also, if he's a Cubs fan - this is a little more understandable. Not to turn this into a sports thread... but people have been born, lived long healthy and productive lives and died since the Cubs won anything. He might feel like this is his last chance to see his team's and therefore his dream come true.

To a lot of people (not just men) sports are nearly a religious love.

You guessed it Nooch, he's a Cubs fan! I try to have sympathy, really I do. I see how much he invests his being into cheering his team on. I just haven't been with anyone before that's this sports obsessed, so maybe I wasn't ready for it. I think he thinks that any sympathy I try to express sounds like I am belittling it, which I don't mean to do. And I try to distract him, but that doesn't work. I think he just needs to wallow in the disappointment for a bit. Which is probably why he spent most of the day yesterday comiserating with fellow Cubs fans on the sports forum he belongs to. Similar to the Purse Forum. But all about sports and video games.

He seems to be in a little better mood today, but yesterday was rough. I'm hoping now that his soccer team is doing well, it will take his mind off baseball!:)

IntlSet · Oct 6th, 2008, 11:55 AM

bellafleur, you need to come to Chicago and hang out with me. My SO is obsessed with baseball, too. We just got cable -- neither he nor I has had a television for the past couple of years and now all he wants to do is watch baseball.

AND he plays fantasy baseball. Thank God that's over with now.

He's always checking scores, etc.

GRR!!!

FrancescaAveiro · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:11 PM

I can totally relate to your post. My BF is a footballer (soccer) and he gets like this a lot! When his team loses he gets depressed and tries to blame himself and then when he does well and wins he still tries to look for improvement. It takes a lot to keep our relationship going and it can be so frustrating at times because I feel like saying "just get over it!" but then I have to think from his point of view and realize what he goes through. He went through a major dissapointment a few months ago and still sometimes brings it up and feels sorry for himself. To make it all worse, we are in a long distance relationship and I just visit every now and then. I've just learnt to be super supportive and eventually he himself realizes he needs to let go, but it does take time.

Out of total curiosity, what is his soccer team that you mentioned? I have a feeling it is AC Milan....???

bellafleur · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FrancescaAveiro

I can totally relate to your post. My BF is a footballer (soccer) and he gets like this a lot! When his team loses he gets depressed and tries to blame himself and then when he does well and wins he still tries to look for improvement. It takes a lot to keep our relationship going and it can be so frustrating at times because I feel like saying "just get over it!" but then I have to think from his point of view and realize what he goes through. He went through a major dissapointment a few months ago and still sometimes brings it up and feels sorry for himself. To make it all worse, we are in a long distance relationship and I just visit every now and then. I've just learnt to be super supportive and eventually he himself realizes he needs to let go, but it does take time.

Out of total curiosity, what is his soccer team that you mentioned? I have a feeling it is AC Milan....???

OMG Francesca!! You guys are guessing all the right teams!! I thought I was trying to be sneaky and protect his identity...:) Not that he ever comes on here, but sometimes I accidentally leave tPF up on the computer screen...:) Yes, it's AC Milan. His parents are actually Italian immigrants from that area, so he and his brother and dad are waaaaay into it. I actually like watching soccer better than any other sport so far, because it's non-stop action, and it's just so difficult to score. And you know that roughly 90 minutes after a game starts, it's truly over, and you can get [him] on with your [his] day! No foolish stopping the clock for injuries, time outs, commercials, etc.:)

That must be really hard for you to be a long distance relationship. I did that once, and it just wasn't meant to be. Hopefully things work out for you two:)

And I think I'm learning that I can't "fix" everything, as sports disappointment can't be fixed. I do just need to let it be and be supportive of his sports obsession. He's actually happy for me when I come home with a new bag, so I have to offer my support!:)

bellafleur · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IntlSet

bellafleur, you need to come to Chicago and hang out with me. My SO is obsessed with baseball, too. We just got cable -- neither he nor I has had a television for the past couple of years and now all he wants to do is watch baseball.

AND he plays fantasy baseball. Thank God that's over with now.

He's always checking scores, etc.

GRR!!!

IntlSet, I'm just a bit north of you, that would be fabulous!:) And how did you live without cable??? I lived without it for a few years, and recently got it again. I have a slight Bravo reality show problem now...:)

And my boyfriend plays fantasy baseball too, and luckily he just won his season, so I didn't have to deal with that disappointment too! Since the fantasy website updated instantly, he would be watching the tv and sitting in front of the laptop and texting his friends all at the same time. And the other computer would have to be left on the fantasy page at all times too, in case, he needed to walk to other end of the house, he'd be able to check his score on the way. Craziness!:)

Jahpson · Oct 6th, 2008, 12:41 PM

OMG! yes!!

when his team wins he is the happiest ever. when they lose, you would have thought his best friend just died.

college football that is. and don't watch him during the games, he gets so angry and starts yelling at the screen. I always laugh inside because its so funny.

Once, Ohio State (the infamous game with USC) was losing, on commercial break he said that he wanted to be alone and walked into the closet and was in there for 5 minutes! I checked in and he wasn't crying or anything. just still. very weird

Oct 6th, 2008, 12:37 AM	#1
bellafleur Member	Does your SO suffer from SID: Sports-Induced Depression? I love my boyfriend so much, and he loves me back, and our relationship is wonderful. However, nothing compares to his insatiable, inexplicable, obsessive love of sports. I don't consider this a problem per se, because we really don't have any big problems. I'm just trying to figure out if this is normal... He is absolutely addicted to sports, which I think is pretty normal. There isn't a time of year where he isn't glued to the tv/sports blogs following up to the minute updates on baseball/soccer/football/basketball. He lives and dies for how his favorite teams fare. I would dare say that he loves sports more than I love handbags and fashion, which is quite a feat! What's happening now is that his favorite baseball team just got swept in the playoffs, and I swear he is clinically depressed over it. He's been moping around the house all day, irritated at everything, emotionally eating the whole pan of brownies, etc. It wouldn't worry me if it were just one day, but he's been like this since the first game they lost. And I've seen him go through it for a week when his favorite basketball team lost in the playoffs earlier this year. And when his favorite soccer team didn't make it to the champions league. I have verified with my male co-workers that sports-induced depression is real. One of them said the last time his favorite team blew a playoffs race, he could barely bring himself to get out of bed for two weeks! My boyfriend is a wonderful person, and is happy and cheerful a majority of the time. Nothing I do ever upsets him like this. I just find it so strange and mysterious... I mean, if I was bidding on my HG handbag, and lost it at the last second to a sniper, maybe I'd be upset. For like, an hour. Then I'd just find something else to shop for! The only thing I could seriously see myself getting this depressed about would be something that actually happened to ME personally, like losing a job or a pet or something. But sports?? Does anyone else's SO go through this? If any guys are reading this, do you suffer from SID? (I have decided Sports-Induced Depression deserves an acronym:) What are we women supposed to do to cheer you up? Bake for you, get you in the bedroom, make you watch Disney movies, what? Or do you just need to be avoided and left alone until the next sport catches your interest? Ladies, how do you deal with your SO's when it seems their world is about to end... over a GAME where other men wear tight pants and slap each other on the rear??:) __________________ Have you signed up at www.Bonanzle.com yet?? Join us in the mass exodus from you-know-where!!

Oct 6th, 2008, 12:40 AM	#2
leothelnss Bad in a good way Location: Burtonsville, MD	I think the only thing men love more than sports is sex.. I'll leave it at that __________________ myspace.com/leothelnss "It's cool to know nothin'" - Kaiser Chiefs

Oct 6th, 2008, 02:27 AM	#5
nooch bubblehead Location: new mexico via BROOKLYN NY	I was going to say yes, and I do too but I've never been unable to get out of bed after the Yankees screw up. And I am still not over the 1995 Division Series. Also, if he's a Cubs fan - this is a little more understandable. Not to turn this into a sports thread... but people have been born, lived long healthy and productive lives and died since the Cubs won anything. He might feel like this is his last chance to see his team's and therefore his dream come true. To a lot of people (not just men) sports are nearly a religious love. __________________ FAT AND FABULOUS! CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK NOT THE WAY YOU LOOK! http://www.natreasures.com Authentic American Indian jewelry & crafts All orders ship free PM me for discount codes

Oct 6th, 2008, 03:09 AM	#6
Junkenpo Boom, baby! Location: 2500 miles from any continental landmass	^^ ditto. Not to demean or take anything away from anyone's beliefs or religion, but my ex-BF counted certain sports equal to his love for me. (please note the fact he is EX-bf, lol!) Watching said sport was "going to church" so we couldn't do anything on those days. "Can't. I'll be at church," was his reply. Which meant he'd be parked in front of his tv, hypnotized all day. And I'll always remember the day my bday coincided with the Superbowl. sigh I got no attention that day & no apologies, either! __________________ Love the animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy untroubled-- Fyodor Dostoyevsky] PONDERING: Damier Pochette Melville, mini pochette, Naviglio; Ivoire Epi Alma; Amarante cles or keyholder...

Oct 6th, 2008, 05:55 AM	#7
Laurie8504 chocolate...where? Location: Italy	Hmm, this does seem a bit unhealthy. Maybe time for an intervention? My SO was a professional athlete, so he is understandably a little sports-obsessed. But just with that one sport. Which fortunately is only on tv for about 2 to 4 weeks a year. But to have an emotional breakdown over it is really extreme, is there anything else your husband enjoys that could serve as a distraction? Get him out of the house! Go bike riding, take a cooking class, work out (endorphins), or better yet, just go play sports instead of watching them. __________________ flickr

Oct 6th, 2008, 12:55 AM	#3
killerstrawbery Sofa King Banned Location: Bmore	awwww ur so sweet! i would just disconnect all the comps and tv's and force him to stop sports altogether lol, i cant stand guys into sports

Oct 6th, 2008, 02:05 AM	#4
ShelleyBaby Member Location: Scotland	That's a bit extreme. It's only a sport! I really don't think that is normal or healthy behaviour at all. Maybe he should go and see someone about it. :\|

Oct 6th, 2008, 07:44 AM	#8
jellybebe Back to school! Location: Canada	This is exactly why my bf doesn't watch sports in any sort of religious fashion - he knows how depressing/disappointing it can be when his teams lose! However, I think a lot of men do watch tons of sports and thus get sad/angry when their teams lose. See the original "Fever Pitch" starring Colin Firth for an example! __________________ Wish List: LV Farandole bracelet (WL) LV pink scuba pochette (WL) white Balenciaga City with GGH (?) Prada E/W Gauffre

Oct 6th, 2008, 11:18 AM	#9
twinkle.tink Pixie Duster Location: Just call me Tink ;)	My husband goes through this, but I can't fault him....so do I. Just give him time, he'll get over it. __________________

Oct 6th, 2008, 11:55 AM	#11
IntlSet Bonjour! Location: Chicago	bellafleur, you need to come to Chicago and hang out with me. My SO is obsessed with baseball, too. We just got cable -- neither he nor I has had a television for the past couple of years and now all he wants to do is watch baseball. AND he plays fantasy baseball. Thank God that's over with now. He's always checking scores, etc. GRR!!! __________________ www.drinkmorechampagne.com

Oct 6th, 2008, 12:11 PM	#12
FrancescaAveiro Member	I can totally relate to your post. My BF is a footballer (soccer) and he gets like this a lot! When his team loses he gets depressed and tries to blame himself and then when he does well and wins he still tries to look for improvement. It takes a lot to keep our relationship going and it can be so frustrating at times because I feel like saying "just get over it!" but then I have to think from his point of view and realize what he goes through. He went through a major dissapointment a few months ago and still sometimes brings it up and feels sorry for himself. To make it all worse, we are in a long distance relationship and I just visit every now and then. I've just learnt to be super supportive and eventually he himself realizes he needs to let go, but it does take time. Out of total curiosity, what is his soccer team that you mentioned? I have a feeling it is AC Milan....???

Oct 6th, 2008, 12:41 PM	#15
Jahpson Member Location: The Playground	OMG! yes!! when his team wins he is the happiest ever. when they lose, you would have thought his best friend just died. college football that is. and don't watch him during the games, he gets so angry and starts yelling at the screen. I always laugh inside because its so funny. Once, Ohio State (the infamous game with USC) was losing, on commercial break he said that he wanted to be alone and walked into the closet and was in there for 5 minutes! I checked in and he wasn't crying or anything. just still. very weird __________________ Amazingly Sophisticated Happy Holidays to all my TPF friends!