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IntlSet · Nov 20th, 2007, 02:41 PM

I am just curious (and also curious how many are willing to admit this): do you compare your significant other to the guys your friends are dating/married to? Of course this can go either way: as a result you can feel fortunate/smug/grateful or you can feel unfortunate/insecure/like you might deserve better.

Or do you tend to think of your SO in a vacuum?

I will be the first to admit: I definitely compare boyfriends. This is actually a favorite topic among my girlfriends, for better or worse... I don't know that competitiveness is at the heart of the matter, so much as mere NOSINESS! :-)

Just throwing the topic out there!

RowanOak · Nov 20th, 2007, 03:14 PM

I honestly don't think I've ever done that. What I *have done is to compare him to the guys I dated before we were married. He stacks up way better, as far as 'marriage material,' than anyone else I could have married.

princessaj0603 · Nov 20th, 2007, 03:21 PM

^ Yeah I am the same way. I look at the people I have dated in the past and realize how lucky I am to finally have found a person that is everything they were not! I tell him sometimes too, how awesome he is and how he is unlike anyone else! (makes him feel good!!)

Syntagma · Nov 20th, 2007, 03:37 PM

Originally Posted by RowanOak

I honestly don't think I've ever done that. What I *have done is to compare him to the guys I dated before we were married. He stacks up way better, as far as 'marriage material,' than anyone else I could have married.

Same for me! That's the reason I married him!

mulberrylove · Nov 20th, 2007, 03:57 PM

I think you maybe comparing boyfriends to your friends boyfriends etc because you have yet to find "THE ONE" ... when you do you won't need to compare becuse you will have all you need and comparison will be a thing of the past. I have compared in the past but now i'm married it really wouldn't enter my head to compare.... i'm happy with what i've got (hence why i married him!)

Sternchen · Nov 20th, 2007, 04:48 PM

Hmmm, don't really compare him to other friends' boyfriends / husbands, but I do compare him to my exes!!!!!!!!!!!

mulberrylove · Nov 20th, 2007, 04:50 PM

Originally Posted by lamiastella

Hmmm, don't really compare him to other friends' boyfriends / husbands, but I do compare him to my exes!!!!!!!!!!!

and...... how does he compare? Hopefully he wins hands down !!!

siworae · Nov 20th, 2007, 04:58 PM

I have never compared any of the guys I've dated with any of my girlfriends' boyfriends. It just never occured to me... my best friend married her h.s. sweetheart... they've been together 9 years now (about 1.5 years as a married couple)... for as long as I've known him, we've been pretty good friends. Since she is like a sister to me, i've always thought of him like a brother.

Perhaps it's because we have different tastes in men... the guys my friends date are so different from the guys I date. So, there really isn't much to compare, I guess.

siworae · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:03 PM

edit... oops, posted in wrong thread!

keya · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:22 PM

Originally Posted by siworae

Perhaps it's because we have different tastes in men... the guys my friends date are so different from the guys I date. So, there really isn't much to compare, I guess.

I agree. I don't compare the men I date with my friends boyfriends, because I would never date their boyfriends. Not because I don't like them, but because they're simply not my type. Some of them are perfect for my friends, though.

I'm currently single, but I didn't really compare my ex to any of my other exes either, apart from to think how lucky I was to finally have found someone who completed me (or so I thought..)

IntlSet · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:35 PM

Wow, my friends and I are apparently unique...! I often hear "I wish my boyfriend made as much as yours" (or whatever variation of some sentiment) and I myself have said "I wish my boyfriend were as considerate as yours" etc. etc. Hmm, good to know.

Glamfoxx · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:36 PM

I stopped comparing the men in my life when I met my husband. At that point, there was no need to do so anymore! He is the best in every way. I never really compared the men in my life to the men in my friends lives.

amanda · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:40 PM

lol...i don't...we all date douchebags, so there's no 'i wish he was as considerate as yours!' they're all poor, too. and i'm single anyway, and usually my girlfriends and i aren't all dating at once. in fact, most of my girlfriends are chronically single.

IntlSet · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:51 PM

Originally Posted by amanda

lol...i don't...we all date douchebags, so there's no 'i wish he was as considerate as yours!' they're all poor, too. and i'm single anyway, and usually my girlfriends and i aren't all dating at once. in fact, most of my girlfriends are chronically single.

I am going to change THAT!

I haven't figured out how but I'm working on it, Amanda.

shoefan · Nov 20th, 2007, 05:51 PM

I don't compare, but I do hear stories of co-workers' and other acquaintances' spouses, and usually count my blessings.

Nov 20th, 2007, 02:41 PM	#1
IntlSet OP Bonjour! Joined: Jan 2006 Location: Chicago Posts: 12,990	Comparing your significant other I am just curious (and also curious how many are willing to admit this): do you compare your significant other to the guys your friends are dating/married to? Of course this can go either way: as a result you can feel fortunate/smug/grateful or you can feel unfortunate/insecure/like you might deserve better. Or do you tend to think of your SO in a vacuum? I will be the first to admit: I definitely compare boyfriends. This is actually a favorite topic among my girlfriends, for better or worse... I don't know that competitiveness is at the heart of the matter, so much as mere NOSINESS! :-) Just throwing the topic out there!
	__________________ www.drinkmorechampagne.com Last edited by IntlSet; Nov 20th, 2007 at 02:48 PM.

Nov 20th, 2007, 03:14 PM	#2
RowanOak Member Joined: Aug 2006 Location: Deep South Posts: 1,333	Re: Comparing your significant other I honestly don't think I've ever done that. What I *have done is to compare him to the guys I dated before we were married. He stacks up way better, as far as 'marriage material,' than anyone else I could have married.
	__________________ Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

Nov 20th, 2007, 03:21 PM	#3
princessaj0603 Happily Engaged! Joined: Jul 2007 Location: Shopping... Posts: 2,354	Re: Comparing your significant other ^ Yeah I am the same way. I look at the people I have dated in the past and realize how lucky I am to finally have found a person that is everything they were not! I tell him sometimes too, how awesome he is and how he is unlike anyone else! (makes him feel good!!)
	__________________ "A girl must always be two things, classy and fabulous" BOSTON MEET 8/23!!! SO EXCITED!!!

Nov 20th, 2007, 03:57 PM	#5
mulberrylove Member Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 680	Re: Comparing your significant other I think you maybe comparing boyfriends to your friends boyfriends etc because you have yet to find "THE ONE" ... when you do you won't need to compare becuse you will have all you need and comparison will be a thing of the past. I have compared in the past but now i'm married it really wouldn't enter my head to compare.... i'm happy with what i've got (hence why i married him!)
mulberrylove Member Joined: Mar 2007 Posts: 680

Nov 20th, 2007, 04:48 PM	#6
Sternchen Proud mama of 3! Joined: May 2006 Location: Bavaria, Germany Posts: 13,954	Re: Comparing your significant other Hmmm, don't really compare him to other friends' boyfriends / husbands, but I do compare him to my exes!!!!!!!!!!!
	__________________ Dear Santa, I have been a very good girl this year and have worked very hard for my family, my school and my job. This year I would like to wish for only one thing: THE CUPCAKE CAR!!! Please and thank you. Love, Melanie

Nov 20th, 2007, 04:58 PM	#8
siworae 라이어게임 시즌2 Joined: Jul 2006 Location: 미니애폴리스 Posts: 3,820	Re: Comparing your significant other I have never compared any of the guys I've dated with any of my girlfriends' boyfriends. It just never occured to me... my best friend married her h.s. sweetheart... they've been together 9 years now (about 1.5 years as a married couple)... for as long as I've known him, we've been pretty good friends. Since she is like a sister to me, i've always thought of him like a brother. Perhaps it's because we have different tastes in men... the guys my friends date are so different from the guys I date. So, there really isn't much to compare, I guess.
	__________________ "나 사랑을 하고있어요, 사랑에 빠졌어요 더 이상 숨길 수 없어요 뜨거운 설레임 드디어 만날 수 있었어요, 꿈을 꾸었어요 식지 않는 여름의 갈망 찾고있었어요 당신만을..." ♥

Nov 20th, 2007, 05:03 PM	#9
siworae 라이어게임 시즌2 Joined: Jul 2006 Location: 미니애폴리스 Posts: 3,820	Re: Comparing your significant other edit... oops, posted in wrong thread!
	__________________ "나 사랑을 하고있어요, 사랑에 빠졌어요 더 이상 숨길 수 없어요 뜨거운 설레임 드디어 만날 수 있었어요, 꿈을 꾸었어요 식지 않는 여름의 갈망 찾고있었어요 당신만을..." ♥

Nov 20th, 2007, 05:35 PM	#11
IntlSet OP Bonjour! Joined: Jan 2006 Location: Chicago Posts: 12,990	Re: Comparing your significant other Wow, my friends and I are apparently unique...! I often hear "I wish my boyfriend made as much as yours" (or whatever variation of some sentiment) and I myself have said "I wish my boyfriend were as considerate as yours" etc. etc. Hmm, good to know.
	__________________ www.drinkmorechampagne.com

Nov 20th, 2007, 05:36 PM	#12
Glamfoxx Member Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 1,394	Re: Comparing your significant other I stopped comparing the men in my life when I met my husband. At that point, there was no need to do so anymore! He is the best in every way. I never really compared the men in my life to the men in my friends lives.
Glamfoxx Member Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 1,394

Nov 20th, 2007, 05:40 PM	#13
amanda RIP Uga VII Joined: Oct 2005 Location: Athens, GA Posts: 11,739	Re: Comparing your significant other lol...i don't...we all date douchebags, so there's no 'i wish he was as considerate as yours!' they're all poor, too. and i'm single anyway, and usually my girlfriends and i aren't all dating at once. in fact, most of my girlfriends are chronically single.
	__________________ PROUD TO BE A UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA BULLDOG! Follow me on Twitter

Nov 20th, 2007, 05:51 PM	#15
shoefan Member Joined: Jul 2006 Posts: 425	Re: Comparing your significant other I don't compare, but I do hear stories of co-workers' and other acquaintances' spouses, and usually count my blessings.
shoefan Member Joined: Jul 2006 Posts: 425

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