[vuittonamour]

okay, don't get all in a huff! lol i promise this thread will not turn out like the last one...lol, i know a lot of people were getting frusterated with me. i promise it won't get long. lol.

so i have been talking to someone new. he doesn't live here, but he came out my way for a business thing this past weekend. we'd been talking on the phone for about two weeks, and then the phone calls ended up being anywhere from 2-4 hours long. lol. he's pretty upfront about his feelings, but because of what happened to me i have been quite distant, in my opinion. he knows what happened to me and i think is understanding because of it, but i'm quite weary. i guess i learned something from the last time because thus far i've really been guarding my heart, and been very "whatever, we'll see what happens." we hung out friday and saturday night and then i drove back up there on sunday for a few minutes to say goodbye before he left. now he's talking about coming back out here early in the new year to see me. i like him, but i think because of my fiasco i'm very skeptical. and maybe it's just a little too much too soon...i'm not used to hearing a guy tell me he misses me and calling me exactly when he says he will. i know that's all i wanted in the past but now i'm like...back up, back up!!!! haha. takes some getting used to.

anyway, he's mentioned a couple times, "maybe i'll get you *this* for christmas, or *that* for christmas." i'm afraid when he comes back this way he'll have something for me. i honestly don't know if i should buy him anything...i know what he likes and where he shops and that kind of thing...but honestly i feel it's a little early. i just met him this past weekend but with him living so far we've had to establish whether we think this might go anywhere and whether or not it's worth pursuing. at this point i do like him, he deserves a chance. it's not fair to let past relationships dictate how i feel about someone, or throw all that baggage onto the new guy's shoulders. but a christmas present? what do i do if he comes here with something for me and i say i feel it was too early to buy him anything? do you think he'd understand or do you think he would be upset?

[Jahpson]

christmas card and a Starbucks gift card.

sorry, you gotta play your cards right if you want a REAL present from me. LMAO

[candace117]

Oh VA, I wish I was able to post on your last thread.

anyway,
Maybe not get him anything too expensive, but if you like spending time with him and enjoy his company there is nothing wrong with getting him a little something. What does he like? Things like a classy bottle of wine or things like that, are nice when you don't want to get them a 'gift' like for a SO. That way it's sort of nonconfrontational and doesn't really cross any lines...it's safe.

[wordpast]

This happened to me... years ago when I was in the dating world. I had literally just started talking to this guy a week before Christmas. I thought we would not exchange gifts. Well he ended up getting me a book by one of my favorite authors. It was inexpensive but I thought it was thoughtful. I felt so bad that I didn't get him anything. So just get him a small, inexpensive gift. Something you think he'll like.

[wordpast]

I think it's good that you're taking it slow and you're a little hesitant with this one. So I take it the weekend went well...?

[itsnicole]

It's good to hear that you are taking things slow, and being careful with this new guy. I think if you're going to get him anything, just get him something small (nothing expensive). Hope everything works out!

[Kittie LaRoche]

Aww, VA, so nice to hear something good from you I've been following your last thread closely though I didn't have any advice to offer I'm glad that things are looking up for you!!!

I'd get your new guy (does he have a name?! , lol, I don't mean to pry, but since I never got to see Danny and still am kinda curious ...) a nice little something .... def. personal and thoughtful, but not on a boyfriend-y level (yet, hopefully) .... lol, however I'd wait with giving it to him until you got something from him

[lorihmatthews]

I think the Starbucks gift card is a nice safe option. And if he doesn't get anything for you, you can use the card for yourself!

[LissiSays]

I would get him a giftcard to a store or Starbucks (as previously mentioned). I would pick something that I could use on myself should a gift exchange never happen. It's a thoughtful gift, not too personal and you don't have to go crazy figuring out what to get.

I hope this one works out well. It's good to see you are taking things slow.

[IntlSet]

Just because he wants to get you this or that for Christmas (or has at least mentioned it) doesn't mean you should or need to get him anything, especially if you two aren't especially serious. If you feel its too early to buy him something (and it sure sounds like you do), then don't bother. If he gets you something, that's his choice. Accept politely and that's all.

[SOLIDGOLD2]

I think it's too soon to get him something. IMO you shouldn't jump into anything you posted in another thread 1 or 2 days ago that you still missed danny so you need to get over that before you start something new

[Speedy]

I agree with IntlSet. If you get him anything, make it a small gift card.


And it pleases me no end that you are taking this slow. I wish you all the luck in the world with him.

[vuittonamour]

well you know it's been hard. the area he came to visit was D's area. so i was up there pretty much all weekend. i haven't been up that way since he and i parted ways. i had to freaking drive past his road and stomach going into the same movie theater i was in with him just days before he pulled that crap. it was difficult to get him out of my head because of all of that...i mean, reminders were EVERYWHERE. and yes, i miss him. but in the past, it has taken someone new to get over someone old. i do still think about him everyday...it's hard not to.

but i also think about the new guy every day. and i talk to him every night. for very long periods of time. lol. he tells me things that make me go sometimes. like, he's going away to miami with his family for new years...he wanted to cancel his plane ticket so he could spend it with me. i was like, whoa, no. go have fun with your family. there will be plenty of time to spend with me. he says very sweet things. and we get along great, have stuff in common...and i know he'll go places and do things with me because he wants to see me happy. so things are not serious, but i can see how they could get to that level. but he needs to back it up just a little bit...lol. i guess at this point i am planning on going out his way after he comes back out here to see me in january. he's told me everyone at home wants to know who "she" is. haha i just have to laugh at that.

he's not a real big starbucks drinker. he's huge into nutrition and eating well...eats all natural and organic if he can. this one's in great shape too. lol. but will go out to restaurants and things...would it be wrong to buy a gift certificate to a restaurant or something that maybe we'd want to go to? lol the only reason why i am asking if it's wrong is because i'd be benefiting from the gift too. lollll. but yet at the same time dinner would cost him less.

[vuittonamour]

and yes he has a name but we all know what happened the last time i gave too many details. lolll.

[Jill]

AND ....this is why I DONT AIR my personal business online..........sigh!......