[FourEyedFreak]

Originally Posted by annaversary

OVERALL, I just miss her.. and wish she would find a balance?

that's what you should be telling her! better yet, link her to this page so she can read it herself.

[annaversary]

OH, FourEyedFreak that is A GREAT IDEA!!!! I'm actually going to see if he's live on cam RIGHT NOW so I can send her this link through their chatting thingy..

EDIT/

Actually, I'm going to call her and ask her if we can talk IN PERSON. I was never really a big fan of talking about personal issues over chatting/phone/ or anything to do with the internet. IN PERSON is always better!

[oo0ehxtahcee0oo]

Originally Posted by annaversary

I never webcammed on public servers.. always private.. even with private servers, I still feel like there are "hackers" that may still see me. Now, I don't do anything "explicit" on cam or anything illegal, etc.. but I think it's because of my personal experience of having a 'peeping tom' which is why I have this view on being seen by other people not knowing REALLY SCARES ME ...

I feel you girl!! Weirdos are out there!! And ya, a lot of public servers have perverts. Gotta be careful!! Good for you!!

[VPT]

Originally Posted by FourEyedFreak

Well, I'm not saying that webcamming with strangers AND meeting them ISN'T dangerous, but you're sort of doing the same thing.... You meet AWESOME strangers on tPF and you talk to them, sort of like what she's doing?

I was about to say the same. What would your friend say when she finds out you hang around a forum which doesn't make use of webcams and we may be communicating to people who have false identities, while she communicates with real people with real video footage of themselves? I think it goes both ways. Then again there are people who become millionaires overnight because of their exposure via the internet. Let's take a look at Tila Tequila, former Ms Nobody and Ms Unwanted now she's a celebrity, model, and MTV show host thanks to Myspace where she built a reputation of having the most "friends", of course from complete strangers. Who knows maybe your friend's trying to pull a Tila? Many other people are trying to follow in her footsteps!

I am aware of the possible dangers she is facing but if she chose to do it, that reveals much of her character you never knew. Sometimes we can't see people as they are, it takes ugly circumstances like these for their true colors to show in the expense of your friendship unfortunately. But that's the way life is.

Additionally people change, all people change especially around the time they're in high school to graduating from college or uni. Friends lose their innocence, their virginity, their sanity, their money, their hopes and dreams, their friendships with others, etc. The world is constantly evolving, please don't take people to remain the way you initially knew them to be. It's kind of you to be concerned for her best interests but realize there's really little you can do unless you are her parent and have the right to intervene.

[Sternchen]

To be quite honest I think you're butting your nose into where it doesn't belong and you're being awfully judgemental. Sure, she's young and she's your friend but what she's doing isn't wrong or hurting anyone. I'm sorry that she's not calling you anymore or being the BFF that she used to be, but people change and I honestly think there is no reason to try and hang on to this girl if you're going to try to change her.

[guccimamma]

you can't do a thing about it, she will get over it eventually...she can't spend the rest of her life webcam-ing (i hope)

just do what you need to do for yourself, try not to worry about her.

[fiatflux]

I actually think there is cause for concern. It's not so much the danger of webcamming that is the problem here. The problem is the addiction she has to the activity. It is clearly superceding everything else in her life, and to the detriment of her other responsibilities in life. I'm sure there are drug abusers who function at about the same level that she is. If there were drugs involved, there would be suggestions of an intervention. I am almost positive that she is probably not happy with her current life and her addiction. It's a form of escape...and it is extremely difficult to tear oneself away from that escape and face real life relationships and responsibilities.

[annaversary]

I really appreciate your post fiatflux, thank you. But I've decided to just SIT DOWN and talk, and tell her how I feel. And she's my best/girlfriend, this hasn't harmed anyone yet, and I just hope she doesn't do anything to harm anyone or especially herself, but I am definetly not going to throw away this amazing friendship of ours. And I do believe it's a form of "escape" because I do watch her time to time and she talks about MANY of her PERSONAL issues... I also think it gives her a boost in her confidence because alot of guys tell her shes beautiful in the chats and she seems to enjoy the compliments alot.

[oo0ehxtahcee0oo]

Originally Posted by annaversary

I really appreciate your post fiatflux, thank you. But I've decided to just SIT DOWN and talk, and tell her how I feel. And she's my best/girlfriend, this hasn't harmed anyone yet, and I just hope she doesn't do anything to harm anyone or especially herself, but I am definetly not going to throw away this amazing friendship of ours. And I do believe it's a form of "escape" because I do watch her time to time and she talks about MANY of her PERSONAL issues... I also think it gives her a boost in her confidence because alot of guys tell her shes beautiful in the chats and she seems to enjoy the compliments alot.

great way to see it! she may have a low self esteem so maybe she does love the attention. youre a great friend, glad you arent throwing away a fantastic friendship!!

[lovinalotofbags]

This all becomes a problem when you neglect other things in your life. I would talk to your friend and be blunt, ask her why she lied to you. If she does not want to be your friend anymore, she should say so. Talking to someone on line is harmless if you keep it innocent but if you are meeting them in person, that is dangerous. This is not a dating site she is on. These are people filming their lives. It is just like JustinTV. I always wondered why someone would do this. I guess it is no different than Big Brother or those other reality shows.