Anybody ever had a boyfriend just disappear?

[Roe]

this happened to me. i was dating a guy for a lil while in college for a few months and he disappeared. After 1 month or so I found out he had to be flown on emergency back to NY because he was having complications with Cancer. It had come back.

His roomate eventually came looking for me and told me everything that was going on. I called him that day soon after and it was true. He was in the hospital. I promised him I was going to go see him but unfortunatley we never made it to that. It really saddened me because when I spoke to his family, they all told me how much he was telling them how he had fallen in love with me and how he wanted to go back to his life. Sometimes I do think about "what could have been" ..if....This happened a lil over 15 years ago.

[vuittonamour]

wow. i couldn't imagine something like this happening to me. i was traumatized when a guy i was dating for a month and a half disappeared on me for about 3 weeks, (re: my thread...i think many many many people here know what i'm talking about) but he came back around eventually...the asshole. tried to underhandedly ruin my new and amazing relationship. then he started getting stalkerish when i ignored him!!! but after a year? wow. yeah, i'd be in agony.

[RowdyAndPete]

OMG. I can't believe this has happened to so many people. I would totally turn into a stalker. I'd be calling him constantly, texting, e-mailing. I'd show up at his house and call the police to do a welfare check on him. I would not stop until I got an answer. After a year of dating he just disappeared? How can that happen? That is so disrespectful!

[~Fabulousity~]

Originally Posted by bagnshoofetish

well, either your friend is a little taxing to be with or the guy is a nincompoop without any social grace whatsoever. why she would let one psychopath ruin her whole dating experiences with others tips me off that she might be a little over-sensitive. sure what he did was hurtful/lame but to obsess about someone elses malfunction to the extent that it ruins her current dating life is a bit much and gives this butthead unwarranted power over her. she needs to wash him completely out of her hair and mind and see every new guy as a fresh start and not judge everyone else based on the actions of some whackjob that obviously needs to grow a pair.

Pretty much! Nothing worse than dating someone and being blamed for someone else's mistakes...

[~Fabulousity~]

Well this has sort of happened to me...
I was seeing this guy for three weeks, he called me every evening and we texted each other everyday for the entire 3 weeks. Then last week mid-week, no call. The next day a txt and then no calls. So I call him that weekend we chat shortly he tells me he has "some things on his mind" our chat is interrupted and he says he will call me back but never did. Its been a week.

I can say for sure now that it is over, oh well just glad I got to see how he is up front vs later on when my feelings were more involved KWIM...

[Solveig79]

My boyfriend of 2 years just broke up via phone/text while i was away for 2 months working abroad. he didn't want to see me when i got back to talk. we had to break up - i wasn't happy and was the one who instigated the conversation about how i was feeling. basically the last time i saw him was when i kissed him goodbye at the airport 2 months ago we were still together. i'm 29 he's 36 so it's not like we're kids.

yet i'm so angry with him. not about our break up - i'm actually happier without him - but the way he has done it. we could have been friends. i'm almost wanting to send him hatemail via post and email and look for him to scare him. it's making me really psycho!!!! i hate him so much and i'm absolutely livid.

sorry about typos btw i dislocated my elbow on saturday and am typing with one hand!

sol xx

[heartnaspade]

There was a thread like this awhile ago, where the OP asked how long you would wait if your bf just disappeared. Needless to say it ended up being a very, very strange thread. Does anyone else remember what I'm talking about?

[cityivy]

i don't know if anyone ready my thread entitled "confused about the dating rules", but this happened to me too. i was seeing a guy for a little more than two months and with one episode of a missed date and probably some misunderstanding, he just disappears. i called him to confirm plans for the next day, left a voicemail. nothing. i texted him the day of the date. nothing. i was so mad that i wrote him an email asking him what happened and that he should have the balls to tell me if he wasn't interested in seeing me anymore. nothing. totally disappeared. i'm still so angry about it.

[Fendi84NJ]

I have had tons of guys disappear...but always somone I have been on 1 to 4 dates with...never a "boyfriend".

I think if an actual boyfriend disappeared, I would go nuts. With the random dating guys, I assume "they are just not that into me" and move on. But with a boyfriend, I would always think did he get sick of me? Or did something horrible happen?

But you would think if it was an offical boyfriend...u would know a friend / family member. If I was dating a guy for a year and he disappeared and I knew his family, heck yes I would call them to try and find him. If they told me he never wanted to see me again, I guess I would have to deal with that person's immaturity, but I would make an attempt to contact them saying I was worried at first.

[lcp]

I've been with my boyfriend for seven months. I am 24 and he is 22, maybe that is the problem. I also have a son. Smetimeshe can be amaxing and he seems really into me but sometims withdraws, i think he finds it hard to commit.

His Mother has had the builder in so he had to live with me for a month, aftr two weeks both of us could not take it anymore. But we did leave on good terms and he text me he misses me nd loves me. Then he disappears to a friend's house. He ignores my calls and then ten hours later texts me back tellingme he does have respect for me, just findng it hard after what ha gone on. He has not bothered with me for a week. I've been going out of my mind becuase I ned closure and can't help for him to come running back so i can reject him. I know I shoud move on and I'm trying but I just want him to chase me.

[lcp]

Sorry about the typo's. Any advice? x

[rainedrop1019]

Wow - after a year?? Now that is shocking. I've gone cold turkey on some guys that I casually dated and vice versa, but since we weren't exclusive or had been seeing each other for a long time, I don't feel bad to be honest. That's just what happens when you're dating sometimes. But after a year of a committed relationship? That just leaves me speechless.

Something along those lines happened to one of my old coworkers. I can still see how bitter he is about it but I can't blame him at all. He was married to his wife for quite a number of years, nice house, he had a great job, they had lovely kids, etc. One day, while he was at work, she cleaned her things out of the house, left him a short note that it was over, left and filed for divorce. Talk about a shocker! I don't know the extent of their relationship but for someone to up and leave a marriage like that blows my mind.

I'm so sorry to anyone that's experienced this kind of relationship....

[spoiled_brat]

Originally Posted by lcp

I've been with my boyfriend for seven months. I am 24 and he is 22, maybe that is the problem. I also have a son. Smetimeshe can be amaxing and he seems really into me but sometims withdraws, i think he finds it hard to commit. His Mother has had the builder in so he had to live with me for a month, aftr two weeks both of us could not take it anymore. But we did leave on good terms and he text me he misses me nd loves me. Then he disappears to a friend's house. He ignores my calls and then ten hours later texts me back tellingme he does have respect for me, just findng it hard after what ha gone on. He has not bothered with me for a week. I've been going out of my mind becuase I ned closure and can't help for him to come running back so i can reject him. I know I shoud move on and I'm trying but I just want him to chase me.

See, in your heart you already know the answer.

[jackie100]

Originally Posted by heartnaspade

There was a thread like this awhile ago, where the OP asked how long you would wait if your bf just disappeared. Needless to say it ended up being a very, very strange thread. Does anyone else remember what I'm talking about?

Yep, it was me who made the thread. And yes my ex disappeared after dating together and even living together 2+ years... He chose to never ever connect me again and cut me off completely. I know he's alive and ok though, I am still close friends with his sister and he is living back home with his family now.
It has been around 1 year and 9 months since he left me.

[Charles]

Originally Posted by lcp

I've been with my boyfriend for seven months. I am 24 and he is 22, maybe that is the problem. I also have a son. Smetimeshe can be amaxing and he seems really into me but sometims withdraws, i think he finds it hard to commit. His Mother has had the builder in so he had to live with me for a month, aftr two weeks both of us could not take it anymore. But we did leave on good terms and he text me he misses me nd loves me. Then he disappears to a friend's house. He ignores my calls and then ten hours later texts me back tellingme he does have respect for me, just findng it hard after what ha gone on. He has not bothered with me for a week. I've been going out of my mind becuase I ned closure and can't help for him to come running back so i can reject him. I know I shoud move on and I'm trying but I just want him to chase me.

Not sure what this has to do with the thread, but I'll give it a shot.

Instead of worrying about this guy, you should probably try to see a counselor to address your insecurity issues. I have a feeling that once those are handled, you won't have any need for a man to chase you.