yelling

[nycbagaddict]

Originally Posted by SOLIDGOLD2

I dont see how a 17 month old can push your buttons and even if he does so what he is a baby and doesn't understand why your yelling at him. Even if he laughs he can still sense the tension and stress in your voice. that fact you yell at your baby is sad IMO

you must be one of those lucky parents that dont have a hyperactive son who loves to pinch, grab, hit his cousins out of no where when he gets excited..and runs around the house up and down the stairs to give me a heartattack for him to fall etc...and when i yell its when i say NO really loud and firm.i didnt say SCREAM, i said yell as in someone with authority. like i said, it doesnt really work because he just laughs. maybe you can give me some advice since you think its sad without you being in my position.

[ilovepinkhearts]

i try my hardest, but after i have told them 15 times to put their crayons away and to clear the table off and they ignore me and do their own thing, my voice gets loud.

or i have told my 4 yr old a million times to not take food or drinks into the living room or into his room and he does it anyways and smiles at me with this lil sly look, my voice gets loud.

when i have to remind them for 40th time to turn off the bathroom light when they are finished, my voice gets loud.

:)

[dell]

Originally Posted by bohohobo

It's only human nature to yell or lose temper (so long as it's not a habit) you're not failing. It's very hard for other people to understand SAHMs sometimes. Just because we don't go to work everyone else assumes it's easy life and caring for a baby is no big feat. But they don't realize the longer you spend with a baby the more likely you're gonna get temperamental. It's not an easy feat, you're doing great.

Well said! It can be really hard some days.

[nycbagaddict]

Originally Posted by dell

Well said! It can be really hard some days.

AMEN! Imagine taking care of a 17 month old and a newborn..both boys! juggling, running, feeding, changing, teaching, sleepless nights, etc...on top of cooking, cleaning, managing household!

...sometimes after youve talked to child nicely and calmly and they repeat being a rascal over and over again..there is no other way but to yell, NO, STOP IT!!!!

[nataliam1976]

My SO has a different method that has been working for years for his son. He is usually very calm and patient and loving, but if the little one goes too far, he gets this very cold look in his eyes and his voice changes a lot. He doesnt yell or scream, but even I hide under the table when he uses it. Its a sort of "the game is over", very serious tone. I have never seen Pat push further after my SO transforms into this strict, you do not want to mess around with me guy.

[vhdos]

Originally Posted by SOLIDGOLD2

I dont see how a 17 month old can push your buttons and even if he does so what he is a baby and doesn't understand why your yelling at him. Even if he laughs he can still sense the tension and stress in your voice. that fact you yell at your baby is sad IMO

These comments are not even appropriate here IMO. This poster probably has no kids because anyone with kids would understand that a 17 month-old can certainly push buttons.

[vhdos]

Originally Posted by nataliam1976

My SO has a different method that has been working for years for his son. He is usually very calm and patient and loving, but if the little one goes too far, he gets this very cold look in his eyes and his voice changes a lot. He doesnt yell or scream, but even I hide under the table when he uses it. Its a sort of "the game is over", very serious tone. I have never seen Pat push further after my SO transforms into this strict, you do not want to mess around with me guy.

That's the approach that I would like to take. I think the problem is that I am sweet, loving mommy and they don't always take me seriously. I do time-outs and I always try to follow-through with rule-breaking/punishments, but they still seem to listen to DH better than me. I suppose maybe I don't "look" the part at 5'3", 99 pounds, so maybe that's part of it. Sometimes I feel like I have to raise my voice for them to know that I mean business. I'm going to try working on my tone of voice rather than the volume of my voice.

[nycbagaddict]

Originally Posted by vhdos

These comments are not even appropriate here IMO. This poster probably has no kids because anyone with kids would understand that a 17 month-old can certainly push buttons.

THANK YOU!!! because i was a bit hurt that she would say that it was sad. as if i was some abuser of a baby or something=(

[vhdos]

Originally Posted by nycbagaddict

THANK YOU!!! because i was a bit hurt that she would say that it was sad. as if i was some abuser of a baby or something=(

Well, after looking through some old posts, it looks as if that poster does have children (I think).
Don't sweat it. I'm pretty sure that most of us in this thread were smart enough to realize that you are not screaming at a 17 month-old. We've all been frustrated as mothers and yes, even a 17 month-old can drive us crazy sometimes
Back to topic.

[ms p]

Originally Posted by vhdos

anyone with kids would understand that a 17 month-old can certainly push buttons.

i agree with vhdos. i only have 1 baby and she's younger than 17 months. there was a period of time i scolded her fairly loudly at home. imo 17 months is old enough to understand and to test the limits of their parents so i think it's understandable how anyone can loose their voice for at least once. being 1st time parent i'm constantly learning on the "job". whenever i feel that i'm doing anything inappropriate (eg scolding loudly) i try to change (i'm glad to say i've stopped scolding my baby loudly recently!)

[Infinitum]

My approach: he's 3 now and has been my approach since he was about 18 months or so.

If he defies me the first time I ask him nicely, then he goes straight to time out. No questions. I simply take him calmly and gently. But if I continuously give him "warnings" and constantly tell him, of course it's going to wear on the nerves.....and then you'll eventually reach your limit and yell.

Try something along those lines......it REALLY helps prevent getting flared up...

I can say his time outs have gotten less frequent to almost non existent.

Good luck. :)

[DlkinVegas]

I'm guilty. I hate yelling-my father yelled all*the*time & unfortunately it stuck with me. I found this book rec. on BBC today, I'm going to pick up.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/076...pf_rd_i=507846

[bohohobo]

Originally Posted by vhdos

Well, after looking through some old posts, it looks as if that poster does have children (I think).

Or wears ear plugs.

[Rockst@r]

I have yelled at my soon to be 6yr old when she does not clean her room. I'm human. After telling her over and over again and then I walk in her room and she is watching tv, yes I do lose patience. Other than that, she's a sweetie pie. I yell (not scream) "no" at my 9 month old for him to understand that he may hurt himself trying to do something (like throw himself off my bed). Other than that, I don't really yell too much, and NEVER in public!

I admire (but also wonder how it's possible) for anyone to have been a parent for any period of time without EVER having yelled at their children.

[vhdos]

Originally Posted by bohohobo

Or wears ear plugs.

That's hilarious!!!