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Pregnant and very very annoyed at sister in law :,(

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Aug 7, 2012, 3:55pm   #1
sephorah's Avatar
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sephorah
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So after months of TTC I'm finally pregnant *touchwood* happy BUT am so annoyed I can't stop tearing. On Friday my sister in law found out I was pregnant by seeing an application on my iPhone, I was stupid enough to say yes I am * should have lied*. I specifically requested her not to tell anyone because it's very early and I'm already having pains and aches which the doctors have told me to look out for because I had complications in my previous pregnancy. She conveniently went yesterday telling everybody including the little kids in my family that I'm expecting. I am devastated I planned to tell them all once I had my 12 weeks scan too late for that!

I'm sorry I'm ranting away but I am very very worried and angry she shouldn't have done that. Told my husband and he gave her a right bollocking though I see no point to it. :(
Aug 7, 2012, 4:33pm   #2
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Sternchen
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Seph, I am so sorry. What an insensitive person to go against your wishes and blab YOUR news to everyone. Who does she think she is?
Aug 7, 2012, 4:37pm   #3
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mammabyrdie
May The Force Be....
I can't stand in-laws!
Aug 7, 2012, 4:38pm   #4
v
vhdos
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Oh, that was awful of her! What she did was incredibly insensitive and selfish. Honestly, I'd have a hard time letting that one go. How often do you have to see her?
As difficult as it may be, please try not to get too upset over it. Focus on your pregnancy and your happiness. For what it's worth, I'm glad that your DH reprimanded her. The point was that she needed to know that what she did was hurtful.
Aug 7, 2012, 4:44pm   #5
p
platinum_girly
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Oh hun i do feel bad for you, that was a really insensitive thing for her to do, in-laws can be such a$$es!!! My pregnancy got round to all my in-laws before me and hubby had a chance to say anything because of the big mouths on his side, although it wasn't as big of a deal as it is to you because i was still shocked myself about my pregnancy but in your case i can completely empathise because i waited as long as possible to tell my family when i was pregnant with my daughter due to a previous miscarriage and the complete phobia that it would happen again...
I wish you well in your pregnancy, please do not let this stress you out too much, all that matters is the health of you and your baby at this time {hugs}
Aug 8, 2012, 5:38am   #6
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lara0112
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oh, I am so sorry - this was really insensitive, but like others said, don't get stressed out and focus on yourself first of all now.
Aug 8, 2012, 12:34pm   #7
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qudz104
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Im so sorry OP, that was so wrong of your SIL to steal your and your DHs thunder/news like that! Im glad your dh told his sister off though. Like everyone else i would urge you though at this time to focus on your and your babys health and not let the negativety harm your health.

Congrats btw!
Aug 8, 2012, 1:50pm   #8
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rainrowan
where's my bag?!
I hope everything goes well for you, please don't stress out over the behavior of some insensitive clod. You already know you're never going to put yourself in that position again with her. If she doesn't know that already.
Aug 8, 2012, 2:31pm   #9
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coutureinatl
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I know family is excited but people need to realize that it is not their news to share. Don't people like you SIL realize that if you wanted other to know you would make the announcement?

I had a similar situation:
When I got pregnant a few years ago we were excited but cautious as I had a m/c the previous year. I told my mom who kept quiet. Dh told his sister who proceeded to tell anyone and everyone including her kids and my FIL. Unfortunately I miscarried again but SIL did not do the dirty work of telling that news to anyone. A few weeks after the m/c FIL asked DH if he was excited to be a father and that is how we knew she told everyone. Next time I am pregnant I told DH I forbid him from telling his sister anything until we are ready for the world to know.
Aug 8, 2012, 7:33pm   #10
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sephorah
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Thankyou all for your kind words TBH I can't help but be worried about any complications.

In my previous pregnancy I had a dangerously high bp followed by being induced with pills, but as my body responded too fast to the pills the baby's heartbeat went low and he was presumed dead and at that point the doctor quickly did a forcep and pulled him out. Touchwood he is all fine and healthy but I suffered a 2nd degree tear through my vagina, heavy bleeding to the point where i collapsed after birth and continuous pain. I hope you all understand now how scared I am :(

But still all of you have been really kind and I will focus on my little baby and forget annoying inlaws.
Aug 8, 2012, 7:34pm   #11
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sephorah
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Originally Posted by coutureinatl
I know family is excited but people need to realize that it is not their news to share. Don't people like you SIL realize that if you wanted other to know you would make the announcement?

I had a similar situation:
When I got pregnant a few years ago we were excited but cautious as I had a m/c the previous year. I told my mom who kept quiet. Dh told his sister who proceeded to tell anyone and everyone including her kids and my FIL. Unfortunately I miscarried again but SIL did not do the dirty work of telling that news to anyone. A few weeks after the m/c FIL asked DH if he was excited to be a father and that is how we knew she told everyone. Next time I am pregnant I told DH I forbid him from telling his sister anything until we are ready for the world to know.
Sorry to hear about what a pain your SIL was praying for the best for you with sticky beans :)
Aug 8, 2012, 8:25pm   #12
p
platinum_girly
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Awww hun so sorry to hear about what happened to you and understandably you are worried and nervous this time round because things do stick with us. I am wishing the best for you with this pregnancy and i do hope that you keep us all updated with regards to you and the little one
Sep 4, 2012, 9:44am   #13
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Serina
Handbags and Horses
That is SO insensitive! Being pregnant is a big deal and YOUR news to tell! I can feel my punching-fist itching on your behalf!
Sep 4, 2012, 10:33am   #14
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soxx
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Your SIL is such a loudspeaker to go around announcing your pregnancy. Anyway, think positively, now that people around you knows hopefully they'll be more sensitive to your needs and also the little kids, they'll be more careful when around you, some kids can be quite rough.
Enjoy your pregnancy and try to stay positive always! I enjoyed my pregnancy a lot and missed carrying my babies in my womb, sometimes I wish I could stuff them back. Lol.
Sep 4, 2012, 10:35pm   #15
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imashopaholic
when in doubt, shop!
Omg Sephorah this exact same thing happened to me... but with my own sister. I can definitely sympathize with you. She heard the news and the very next day I got messages from extended family and some of her friends congratulating me. I was only 6 weeks at the time and like you had been told by my doctor that I was high risk so had planned to wait til 12 weeks to share the news. It caused major problems with the relationship I have with my sister to the point now where we're not talking. Some people have small minds and big mouths unfortunately.
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