Parenting Books

[nycdiva]

I was wondering if people can recommend parenting books that they have read. My little girl just turned 3 months and I don't feel like she really has a routine.
We put her to bed between 7-8 pm after a nightly bath. She usually wakes once at 4 am for a feed and goes back to sleep to 8 am. During the day, my mother takes care of her. She takes one nap before noon. My mother puts her on the the play mat for tummy time and to play. In the afternoon they go for a walk. She sometimes naps during the walk, sometimes doesn't.
From what I can tell my mother lets her do anything she wants. I feel a little lost since I am not there. I went back to work 4 weeks after a c-section since I had no maternity leave.
Are there any books out there that can help me get on track? Any suggestions would be helpful!

[bohohobo]

I think there are 3 main categories of books. First category on discipline, second on development, and third of solving simple health problems.

For discipline category, there are many books you can read however each may offer conflicting advice. It really boils down to what you want to achieve with your baby. Do you want to impose a schedule, will it be fixed or flexible if you choose?

Discipline
From experience I've read a few books, was highly recommended The Contented Little Baby (by Gina Ford) which has hour by hour break down of what you should do with baby. It worked for me for first 3 weeks but after the first growth spurt everything went haywire. I found not only did a fixed schedule fail miserably - baby refused to conform or didn't understand conformity - it also yielded funny stools. In that book it recommends breastfeeding baby fully on one breast and hindmilk of the other, with a belief that more hindmilk will yield a sleepier baby allowing parents and baby to sleep better. I took the book to the pediatrician and he commented that should never be the way to feed a baby because foremilk contains essential nutrients different from hindmilk although it may appear diluted. Feeding baby too much hindmilk is as bad as feeding baby too much foremilk, the imbalance can lead to long term health disadvantages.

Then someone in the mom's support group mentioned Secrets of the Baby Whisperer (by Blau, Hogg) where a schedule is recommended but unlike the above, it's flexible tailored to your baby's needs. It makes more sense and I'm following the book's advice with some slight tweaking to my baby's needs. Baby has never been happier. He is sleep trained, stopped fussing and will try communicating first (in baby language) for all his needs since about 2 mos old which is a remarkable achievement, gone are his days of crying, he only cries when in pain or sick. Yet some mothers I know don't like this book because they believe babies should be free to do what they want, free to enjoy life and not to be put on a schedule. What I liked most about this book is that it breaks down babies into character categories you'll know what kind of baby you have and how to be the best parent for him/her.

Another book recommended to me was Baby Wise by Gary Ezzo which worked for some mothers I know.

Other books:
The Happiest Baby On The Block by Harvey Karp - half the techniques didn't work for my baby. Might do for yours though.

Developmental books
What to Expect the First Year by Heidi Murkoff
Your Baby's First Year for Dummies by Gaylord and Hagan

Health
Baby 411 by Denise Fields and Ari Brown - great tool to have on hand when an immediate appointment with the pediatrician is not possible. One of the authors is a pediatrician.
Your Baby's First Year by AAP

[StageMum]

Dr. Sears' book, the Baby Book.
Your little one sounds like she is doing really well at night, but I would expect her to nap more than once during the day. Of course, every baby is different.
Be careful if you choose to read the Ezzo book. There is some advice in there that is good, but not all of it is. The main thing to take away from it is that when baby wakes, she should eat, then playtime, then nap. Baby should nap between an hour and an hour and a half. That pretty much sums it up - lol.
It sounds like your baby does have a little bit of a routine, it's okay if there's some flexibility the rest of the time as long as she is content. Don't beat yourself up over it. : )

[eli]

1. you are your child's first teacher
2. heaven on earth: a handbook for parents of young children

I love the simplicity, and natural focus on parenting that these books provided.

[Swanky Mama Of Three]

best book I used was Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child