Originally Posted by vhdos

^I can see where lv_forever is coming from. I don't have just anybody coming in to our home to babysit. When our regular babysitters aren't available, DH starts suggesting all of his friends' young teen daughters. Um, no thanks. I'd rather stay home. It's about comfort level. How relaxing is date night going to be anyways if you're sitting there all night worried about how the kids are with the new babysitter? I think that the bottom line is that most of us need/want time away from our little ones. For some of us, however, time away is dependent on childcare. Not all of us have the luxury of having family (grandparents, etc.) as babysitters and some of us are picky about choosing sitters (and rightfully so).

I agree, it is all about comfort level. There were times when we have thought of moving to a different city/country but then we wouldn't be able to have family near by. I'm sure we wouldn't be able to have time away like we do now.

Very rarely. Like hardly ever.
Date nights are far and few in-between.
I need to start up a date night rotation with some friends, and that way we all get a turn and watch each other's kids.

Sometimes the DH and I will do dinners out with no kids. When he goes on a business trip, sometimes I'll tag along (no kids), but that may be once every year or two.

The kids always have set bedtime because I need "me time" at night.

And I do girls-night-out with my friends about once a month. (I think it's really odd to have kids tag along for that. Not only would I never think my friends wanted them around for that specific occasion, but I want my own time with my friends without being called "Mom"!)

Originally Posted by vhdos

^I can see where lv_forever is coming from. I don't have just anybody coming in to our home to babysit. When our regular babysitters aren't available, DH starts suggesting all of his friends' young teen daughters. Um, no thanks. I'd rather stay home. It's about comfort level. How relaxing is date night going to be anyways if you're sitting there all night worried about how the kids are with the new babysitter? I think that the bottom line is that most of us need/want time away from our little ones. For some of us, however, time away is dependent on childcare. Not all of us have the luxury of having family (grandparents, etc.) as babysitters and some of us are picky about choosing sitters (and rightfully so).

Very true. I lived in another state, away from my family and friends, for a couple of years. My oldest was not old enough to babysit at the time, and I didn't know anyone who I would or could ask to babysit. (We had acquaintances and my husband's work friends, but they weren't anyone we felt close enough to ask to babysit.) At that point in time, we didn't go anywhere. We just had to carve out "alone time" when the kids were asleep pretty much. You make sacrifices as a parent. It didn't really bother me too much.

DH and I have only left our twins once. It was a milestone bday for him and I had my Aunt watch them for me for 2 nights. She has been a post-partem RN for almost 30 years, so I had no issues with leaving them with her.

Other than that, we have not been able to get away. Because we have twins, most people are reluctant to watch them. And my mother has flat out said that she wont. She cant handle them.

We do get a date night once a month when the base offers free childcare for a few hours. Thats always nice.

I'm a sahm. We were overseas for several years so no family/relatives near us. Dh travels for work while me and dd stay home. My 1st "me" time outside the house was when dd was past 1 year old and i could't handle the zero "me" time anymore and insist dh look after dd while i went out for like 3h . After that i made it a point to meet up with my friends at least once every 3 months while dh look after dd. Things got better when dd goes to playschool so i have that time alone. Next year dd will have a full day childcare *** education school. I intend to find a part time job so i can have more social/ work life outside my family. Grandparent is not an option for us even now that we are back to home country.