i think i need to join a support group! my kids are 14 months apart..my son turned 2 in January and my daughter just turned 1. I currently stay at home with them, and my husband does help out but he often travels. OMG, I am so exhausted many days!
can anybody else relate?? I joined a moms group in my area (stay at home moms with kiddos under 4) and while that helps to have folks to socialize with etc, i feel i have it somewhat harder than most...we have NO family in town to help, and my older kid is still in diapers!
if your kiddos are older now... tell me it gets easier.. :)
Hi sweeneet, while I do not have any personal experiences, my sis was in a similar situation as you. Her 2nd and 3rd are only 1 year apart and it was difficult initially. Like you, my BIL also travels often as he is an air steward.
It does get easier in time (her kids are now 7, 5 and 4). She tries to establish some kind of schedule to make things a little more sane. Just want to give you a hug and hang in there !
My kids are 8 and 10 now but they are 18 months apart. The first couple of years are so hard because of the sleep deprivation.
I can say this now because they are older and I am way past the "fog" but it does get better! I swear!
If I could go back and do things a bit differently it would be that I would force myself to get more sleep. I would stay up late to have as much kid free time as I could but I was short changing my sleep needs.
Hang in there! I can say that the last 6 years have been great. They are great friends and for the most part really get along. Once they got to preschool age things started to turn around for me.
Are you able to hire a mothers helper to get a break once a week. How about joining a gym with babysitting so you could get in a workout. My 4 o'clock trip to the gym everyday saved my sanity.
I have two kids that are 18 months apart and I know what you mean... it is exhausting! (They are almost 2 years & 4 months old.) I'm a SAHM, DH works long hours sometimes, and we're not near family that can help... so it is mainly on me for the majority of their care. (We did just start daycare two mornings a week for my youngest, so that my older daughter can do a mommy & me swimming class and soccer class the other morning... so I'm down to one child for a few hours twice a week.)
We originally were going to try the daycare more than two mornings a week, and it was this crazy schedule of one girl was there one morning, the other girl was there the next morning, and one morning a week they were both there for four hours. I only lasted a month, and found it wasn't for me. The daycare was supposed to be a "break" for me (since DH has had to work more hours in this new job), but I found that getting them out the door and to daycare by 8am on the mornings we didn't "need" to be anywhere (i.e. mornings ODD didn't have classes ) was more stressful than just keeping them both with me all day! So I think that month long experiment helped to refresh me, but also helped ease my perspective somewhat... we do still have the two mornings so that I can go to Mommy/tot classes with ODD... so maybe a few mornings or hours of outside help a week could help ease things for you?
And I also go to bed super early... my whole family giggles at me, but they know not to call after 9:30pm - because I'll be in bed!! The kids are bathed and in bed by 7:15pm/7:30pm, giving me a few hours of adult only time - but otherwise the sleep is more valuable to me at this point than doing anything else at 10/11pm...
So I can definitely relate!! There are moments some days where I want to pull my hair out and the times when they both need something or are crying are the worst... but like you, I just keep hoping (and looking for reassurance) - some day it will get easier!
One of my friends has two boys who are about a year apart and really struggled with them as babies, but as they got older they started to play together and amuse each other. They are now really close, and do get up to mischief but it's so cute! I always think the bond between siblings through their teens is usually closer when they are a similar age because they have more in common.
Mine are 20 months apart, and it's great now that they are 6 yrs. and 7.5 yrs. it was hard when it was baby and 2 yr old and my kids were so resistant with the potty, that my son was close to 5 when he stopped wearing pull ups. I recall how hard it was, but started getting easier around 4/6 and just gets easier as they get older. They are best friends and do everything together.
I have a son and a daughter that are about 15 months apart. We have never had any family around to help and yes, it was SO tough for a while. I can say though, that it does get easier (my kids are now 7 and 8 years-old). My one piece of advice would be to adhere to a fairly strict schedule/routine when it comes to things like sleeping and eating. The more structure you can create at home, the less chaos you will have to deal with. I'm not saying that you have to be inflexible and rigid, but my kids have always had routines and they thrive on them. We would have the same nap times, the same bed times, the same bed-time routines, etc. Obviously, the routines change a bit as the kids get older (like reducing or eliminating nap times, later bed times, etc.), but we have always maintained some level of consistency.
My 2 boys are 13 months apart, they are now 8 and 9, wow those toddler years were hard yacka. It does get easier as they get older. Ive since remarried and have another little boy who is 2 years and 8 months old - my husband wants another babba. I know they age difference now wouldn't be as challenging but looking back on the early years with my first two does make me a little hesitant
My girls are 13 months apart. They are now almost 6 and almost 5 years old. But they are adopted, and they have lived with us for only two years. They play really well together, but they also fight a lot. I really hope they will fight less when they grow a little bit older.
I can join your club :) I've got 4 kids who are just 1 year from each other. My oldest son is 9, my daughters are 7 and 6 and the youngest is 5.
5 years ago i felt totally exhausted. Fortunately i had family around me and a nanny. My husband is most of the time at work and also traveling a lot. So i'm still feeling like a single mom at times. But i am good at managing.
Now my three oldest kids are in school and my youngest in kindergarten. So i "just" have to manage the afternoons and weekends.
Next year we'll have our 5th child and it will be kind of different cause then the youngest will be 5 and more years apart from the others.