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Annoying neighbor kids...

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May 2, 2010, 1:57pm   #1
v
Thread Starter
vhdos
Member
Anyone else have annoying neighbor kids? There is a little girl that lives in our neighborhood that is constantly coming over in our yard to play with our kids. I like the fact that my kids have a playmate, but it makes my job as a parent more difficult because her mother never watches her. It also means that my kids go wandering off into their yard and my kids are not an an age where I feel comfortable leaving them to play by themselves outside.
I know that this little girl means well, but she's always bossing my kids around, taking their toys, and telling my kids to go ask me if they can do things that they already know they are not supposed to do (like play with the hose, etc.). This little girl is also FULL of questions, 24/7. She's always hanging around and asking me questions like which car in the garage is mine?, do we have water in our house?, why am I getting the mail?, etc. It goes on and on.....
My life when the neighbor girl is not around is so peaceful, sitting outside and reading a book while my two kids play so nicely together. Then, boom! She comes running over and suddenly I'm chasing them all around the neighborhood and answering a million questions. To top it all off, the mom doesn't really care for me all that much, so I'm not really in a position where I'd feel comfortable saying anything to her (about her lack of supervision). Besides, what would I say, "um, your kid is annoying. can you please limit her time at my house?"
Don't get me wrong, my kids are far from perfect. For all I know, she thinks that my kids are annoying too...
Vent over. Thanks for listening:)
May 2, 2010, 5:55pm   #2
C
ChristyR143
Really?
Yeah...I know how you feel. Before we moved, there were some kids that lived down the street from us, and the little girl was the same age as my oldest, and of course they went to the same school and knew each other, so they liked to play in the afternoon. This little girl had an older (by 3 years) brother and a younger (by 1 years) brother. At first, it was no big deal and they all played really well together, even the older boy, and it was nice. Well, as time went on, and the kids started getting more comfortable around us, they started really acting up and causing problems. Also, the mother, who was a dancer by night, and went to beauty school during the day, got to where she would send the kids down to my house, without calling or asking me, btw, so they could 'play'. Which, of course, was just code for 'I'm tired and want to take a nap so go down to Christy's house for a while'. Luckily not too long after the problems started, she moved, but it was very irritating for a while. There were times that I would make my boys go out back and if they rang the doorbell, I wouldn't answer. Bad, I know, but it got to be too much.

So yeah...I totally get where you are coming from.
May 2, 2010, 6:31pm   #3
olialm1's Avatar
olialm1
windy city
You need a fence
May 2, 2010, 6:38pm   #4
v
Thread Starter
vhdos
Member
Thanks Christy and yes, olialm1, we do need a fence. The problem is that if we put one in now, they would probably get offended by it. We put in a row of Leland Cypress trees so that I don't have to look at their swing set all the time, but they don't go all the way down the driveway and the kids can still get to each other. Oh well, I'll just continue to deal with it and try to focus on how nice it is that my kids have friends:)
May 2, 2010, 8:05pm   #5
ILuvShopping's Avatar
ILuvShopping
★☆★★☆★★☆★
i don't have kids, but i sure do have annoying neighbor kids!!!

young and old...they're ALWAYS in the street. apparently kids don't play in YARDS anymore??
although they are behaved in the fact that if you are driving up on them, they will immediately move off to the sides... but still... sometimes they're just sitting in the street.... where are their parents???

to the east of me i have a young family with a little girl. she's probably about 5. thankfully she is not included in the group of kids that plays in the street. however, recently a new family moved across the street who have 2 girls. one older than my neighbor and one probably the same age or slightly younger.
omigod.... they are SO loud! they're constantly screaming and yelling.... about what? i have no idea. girl stuff i guess lol. but the older girl is really bossy, and it just drives me nuts that she's telling my neighbor girl what to do in her OWN yard.
my neighbors have a chain linked fence in the back yard and their dog is outside lots of time. the older girl from across the street will pretty much be the gate keeper when she's over, telling the other two girls when they can and can not enter and leave. and not in a nice "i'm trying to help you" sort of way.
May 2, 2010, 9:01pm   #6
merika's Avatar
merika
Wol
Originally Posted by vhdos
Anyone else have annoying neighbor kids? There is a little girl that lives in our neighborhood that is constantly coming over in our yard to play with our kids. I like the fact that my kids have a playmate, but it makes my job as a parent more difficult because her mother never watches her. It also means that my kids go wandering off into their yard and my kids are not an an age where I feel comfortable leaving them to play by themselves outside.
I know that this little girl means well, but she's always bossing my kids around, taking their toys, and telling my kids to go ask me if they can do things that they already know they are not supposed to do (like play with the hose, etc.). This little girl is also FULL of questions, 24/7. She's always hanging around and asking me questions like which car in the garage is mine?, do we have water in our house?, why am I getting the mail?, etc. It goes on and on.....
My life when the neighbor girl is not around is so peaceful, sitting outside and reading a book while my two kids play so nicely together. Then, boom! She comes running over and suddenly I'm chasing them all around the neighborhood and answering a million questions. To top it all off, the mom doesn't really care for me all that much, so I'm not really in a position where I'd feel comfortable saying anything to her (about her lack of supervision). Besides, what would I say, "um, your kid is annoying. can you please limit her time at my house?"
Don't get me wrong, my kids are far from perfect. For all I know, she thinks that my kids are annoying too...
Vent over. Thanks for listening:)
It's good for your kids to learn to play with someone else other than siblings, but if she is bugging you to the point that you are getting irritated some ground rules might work.

When she comes over tell her firmly what can and cannot be done - your kids can't go over to her yard, no playing with the hose, they can play nicely together where you can see them. If she bothers you with questions just say "Excuse me, X, but I am very busy with work right now and can't answer your questions". If she disregards your rules or is bossing your kids around, taking their toys and making your uncomfortable by the way she plays, tell her that sorry the way she's playing is making people uncomfortable and that she should go home now. Take your kids indoors for the time being.

Kids get the message pretty quickly, and the threat of having no playmates is usually strong enough to make them behave respectfully in someone else's space.
May 2, 2010, 9:26pm   #7
v
Thread Starter
vhdos
Member
Originally Posted by merika
It's good for your kids to learn to play with someone else other than siblings, but if she is bugging you to the point that you are getting irritated some ground rules might work.

When she comes over tell her firmly what can and cannot be done - your kids can't go over to her yard, no playing with the hose, they can play nicely together where you can see them. If she bothers you with questions just say "Excuse me, X, but I am very busy with work right now and can't answer your questions". If she disregards your rules or is bossing your kids around, taking their toys and making your uncomfortable by the way she plays, tell her that sorry the way she's playing is making people uncomfortable and that she should go home now. Take your kids indoors for the time being.

Kids get the message pretty quickly, and the threat of having no playmates is usually strong enough to make them behave respectfully in someone else's space.
My kids are in preschool and kindergarten, so they both have plenty of opportunities to play with other kids besides each other.
Your suggestions are fine - in theory - but it just doesn't work that way. If I told her to go home, she would probably tell her mom that I told her to do so. I prefer not to rock the boat with the neighbors, especially considering that the mom and I are not the best of friends (although we get along okay). When the questions from the girl get to be too much, I usually just ignore them and they keep coming anyways. And the girl will still order my son, for the 8th time, to go ask me if they can use the hose...
It's a lost cause and just something that I'm going to have to deal with. My kids are mostly happy playing with her, so I guess that I will just focus on that fact and get over it.
Thank you for your input though:)
May 3, 2010, 1:45am   #8
S
SweetGirl8456
Account Deactivated
You can always move
May 3, 2010, 7:47am   #9
v
Thread Starter
vhdos
Member
^um, that's not really a valid option, but thanks.
May 3, 2010, 8:17am   #10
Avril's Avatar
Avril
grly grl
Originally Posted by merika
It's good for your kids to learn to play with someone else other than siblings, but if she is bugging you to the point that you are getting irritated some ground rules might work.

When she comes over tell her firmly what can and cannot be done - your kids can't go over to her yard, no playing with the hose, they can play nicely together where you can see them. If she bothers you with questions just say "Excuse me, X, but I am very busy with work right now and can't answer your questions". If she disregards your rules or is bossing your kids around, taking their toys and making your uncomfortable by the way she plays, tell her that sorry the way she's playing is making people uncomfortable and that she should go home now. Take your kids indoors for the time being.

Kids get the message pretty quickly, and the threat of having no playmates is usually strong enough to make them behave respectfully in someone else's space.
May 3, 2010, 8:38am   #11
merika's Avatar
merika
Wol
You're welcome! The theory does work, lol, I've tried it out with great success on neighbor kids who used to annoy me when they came over to play with my son. I once had to break up a playdate with a kid who wasn't playing nice and when the parent asked me why I said "They didn't seem to be obeying house rules so I thought it best to end the playtime early"...

I guess everything depends on how both sets of parents tackle the issue. Good luck, and I wish you lots of patience!!
May 3, 2010, 5:21pm   #12
p
pollinilove
Member
tell her mother you do not want her at your house .
May 3, 2010, 6:46pm   #13
v
Thread Starter
vhdos
Member
^I've already discussed this point. I would prefer to keep things with the neighbors as pleasant as possible. We all have to live here, so why rock the boat, KNIM? If it were just as simple as telling her mom that I don't want her daughter at my house, then the problem would be solved and I wouldn't need to post here for advice.
I've already gotten some good advice, so I'm just going to tough it out and react appropriately only when necessary.
May 3, 2010, 7:52pm   #14
twinkle.tink's Avatar
twinkle.tink
Choose to be happy
I don't know your exact situation, but I do have to agree Merika, a firm hand usually does wonders without rocking the boat. The fact is most kids know when the are behaving inappropriately and are not eager to run home and tell mom they were not behaving. My DS9's friend was very annoying but has improved greatly, simple because we do not put up with it. It has not seemed to discourage the friendship or his desire to come over, he just is more respectful and obeys the house rules now.

Good luck :)
May 3, 2010, 8:12pm   #15
elle-mo's Avatar
elle-mo
Member
I have the same problem. But what gets me the most is that his kid runs out of his house and just comes over, and his parents could care less. Granted, the kid is a good kid, but I resent 'babysitting' someone else's kid. It really pisses me off, especially if my kids are having a snack, then I give him a snack too. If my kid has to pee, then so does he. So I finally told him that if he's hungry then to go home, if he has to pee then go home. When he does go home, I round up my kids and go in the house and don't answer the door! I know it's mean but c'mon! There was another kid who did this too and I finally told her that if her mom isn't outside to watch her then she can't play.

I know it sounds mean, but so far it works. No one has yet toilet papered my house or left a flaming bag of dog poo on my porch!
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