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flower71 · Jul 6th, 2009, 08:14 AM

Good luck on this journey and thanks for having the guts to start this thread. Most importantly, get help for YOU and not for those you love and who care for you. That's the main reason you should find a solution to stop...

bern · Jul 6th, 2009, 08:19 AM

Little Tiger: Honestly your posts could have been written by me a few years ago.
I also knew I wasn't an alcoholic, but I had become so used to turning to alcohol, that I didn't develop any other coping mechanisms. I guess my turning point was when I finally decided to give up cigarettes, I in turn ended up stopping drinking for 6 months because I knew that I would be tempted to light up if I had a drink in my hand.
Slowly but surely I started to develop better coping mechanisms. Instead of going to the pub after work, I'd go for a walk or a swim. Little things like that.
Since this time, my relationship broke up, I had a car accident, I bought my first little house (all very stressful events), and not once did I turn to alcohol and drink myself stupid. I'm very proud of myself!
I had tried counselling years before, but I realise that at that stage I wasn't ready to make the changes I needed to.
I still enjoy a drink, but I no longer rely on alcohol to make me feel 'better'.
I applaud your courage in coming forward and realising that you need to make changes. I'm confident you'll do just fine!!

boxermom · Jul 6th, 2009, 08:40 PM

Little Tiger, seeing a counselor is a wonderful idea. I hope you find a great therapist who can help you in the areas of your life that are troubling you.

It's entirely possible you can get a handle on this and learn how not to turn to any substance to feel better.

Best wishes.

Little Tiger · Jul 7th, 2009, 02:45 PM

Aww Bern, that's wonderful - congrats to you! I hope I am saying the same as you in a few months!

Yes I'm planning to start counselling, and also thought exercise would be a good idea. Another problem would then be dealing with the feelings of guilt but I guess one step at a time.

alexis77 · Jul 7th, 2009, 08:43 PM

Some good advice in this thread! Little Tiger--sounds as if you are off to a great start. Good Luck!

BagLadie · Jul 7th, 2009, 10:57 PM

Just being aware you may have a problem makes me think you're on the right path. I wish you the very best.

JetSetGo! · Jul 8th, 2009, 02:44 PM

Little Tiger Crazy how sometimes our inner pain can lead us to do things that cause even more, right?

I adore your courage. AA or pills may not be the answer for you. Knowing what you don't want can really help in figuring out what you do want.
I hear that you want balance in your life and sometimes we all tip a little. Be gentle with yourself and try not beat yourself up.
Everyone deals with pain and loss in different ways and talking about it with someone will really help, I assure you. Love to you!

JetSetGo! · Jul 8th, 2009, 02:48 PM

Originally Posted by bern

Little Tiger: Honestly your posts could have been written by me a few years ago.
I also knew I wasn't an alcoholic, but I had become so used to turning to alcohol, that I didn't develop any other coping mechanisms. I guess my turning point was when I finally decided to give up cigarettes, I in turn ended up stopping drinking for 6 months because I knew that I would be tempted to light up if I had a drink in my hand.
Slowly but surely I started to develop better coping mechanisms. Instead of going to the pub after work, I'd go for a walk or a swim. Little things like that.
Since this time, my relationship broke up, I had a car accident, I bought my first little house (all very stressful events), and not once did I turn to alcohol and drink myself stupid. I'm very proud of myself!
I had tried counselling years before, but I realise that at that stage I wasn't ready to make the changes I needed to.
I still enjoy a drink, but I no longer rely on alcohol to make me feel 'better'.
I applaud your courage in coming forward and realising that you need to make changes. I'm confident you'll do just fine!!

Wonderful post! Thank you so much for sharing your experience!

chessmont · Jul 8th, 2009, 05:07 PM

Little Tiger, wishing you success in finding something that works for you to help with the coping - I am sorry for your recent losses.

As another poster or 2 have said, I also don't have an "off" switch. Then, I was finally diagnosed (about 30 years after I recall my first time of not feeling well) as irritable/depressive bipolar. I self-medicated with alcohol. Now I am on meds, and do feel better, not 100% yet. I do enjoy wine, so my coping with the absence of 'off' is to buy just a 1/2 bottle, or (gads! But it is better for my health, so worth it, I will buy a bottle and pour 1/2 down the sink). Whatever works!

Good wishes for you

Little Tiger · Jul 8th, 2009, 06:10 PM

Originally Posted by chessmont

Little Tiger, wishing you success in finding something that works for you to help with the coping - I am sorry for your recent losses.

As another poster or 2 have said, I also don't have an "off" switch. Then, I was finally diagnosed (about 30 years after I recall my first time of not feeling well) as irritable/depressive bipolar. I self-medicated with alcohol. Now I am on meds, and do feel better, not 100% yet. I do enjoy wine, so my coping with the absence of 'off' is to buy just a 1/2 bottle, or (gads! But it is better for my health, so worth it, I will buy a bottle and pour 1/2 down the sink). Whatever works!

Good wishes for you

Chessmost, it's lovely that you had such honesty to post this; it really helps knowing people have had similar experiences. I'm not quite sure I get that though, you mean you purposely bought alcohol to pour down the sink? Or buy a bottle, pour half away and drink the rest? Sorry if I'm being really dense.

Little Tiger · Jul 8th, 2009, 06:19 PM

Originally Posted by Little Tiger

Chessmost, it's lovely that you had such honesty to post this; it really helps knowing people have had similar experiences. I'm not quite sure I get that though, you mean you purposely bought alcohol to pour down the sink? Or buy a bottle, pour half away and drink the rest? Sorry if I'm being really dense.

Aaah sorry, I think I just didn't get that first time round. I'll PM you.

Again so many thanks to people who have been nice about my very ugly problem :-)

Jul 7th, 2009, 02:45 PM	#19
Little Tiger OP Member Joined: Dec 2007 Posts: 208	Aww Bern, that's wonderful - congrats to you! I hope I am saying the same as you in a few months! Yes I'm planning to start counselling, and also thought exercise would be a good idea. Another problem would then be dealing with the feelings of guilt but I guess one step at a time.
Little Tiger OP Member Joined: Dec 2007 Posts: 208

Jul 7th, 2009, 08:43 PM	#20
alexis77 Adopt a Greyhound! Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 2,087	Some good advice in this thread! Little Tiger--sounds as if you are off to a great start. Good Luck!
	__________________ Adopting one greyhound won't change the world, but the world will surely change for that one greyound.

Jul 7th, 2009, 10:57 PM	#21
BagLadie Got a handle on it Joined: Nov 2006 Location: Red Sox Nation Posts: 7,002	Just being aware you may have a problem makes me think you're on the right path. I wish you the very best.
	__________________ If life hands you lemons, make a vodka and lemonade. Then use the rest on your elbows.

Jul 8th, 2009, 02:44 PM	#22
JetSetGo! CL Soldier of '08 Joined: Feb 2008 Location: Living in my Louboutins Posts: 10,443	Little Tiger Crazy how sometimes our inner pain can lead us to do things that cause even more, right? I adore your courage. AA or pills may not be the answer for you. Knowing what you don't want can really help in figuring out what you do want. I hear that you want balance in your life and sometimes we all tip a little. Be gentle with yourself and try not beat yourself up. Everyone deals with pain and loss in different ways and talking about it with someone will really help, I assure you. Love to you!
	__________________ My Bags & My CLs Report Fake CLs & How to Report please let me know if you see... Sing Sing (40.5, 41, 41.5) Shocking Pink Satin Rolando (41) Blue Glittart Ron Ron (41)

Jul 8th, 2009, 05:07 PM	#24
chessmont Member Joined: Aug 2006 Location: CA, USA Posts: 4,693	Little Tiger, wishing you success in finding something that works for you to help with the coping - I am sorry for your recent losses. As another poster or 2 have said, I also don't have an "off" switch. Then, I was finally diagnosed (about 30 years after I recall my first time of not feeling well) as irritable/depressive bipolar. I self-medicated with alcohol. Now I am on meds, and do feel better, not 100% yet. I do enjoy wine, so my coping with the absence of 'off' is to buy just a 1/2 bottle, or (gads! But it is better for my health, so worth it, I will buy a bottle and pour 1/2 down the sink). Whatever works! Good wishes for you
	__________________

Jul 6th, 2009, 08:14 AM	#16
flower71 flower71 Joined: Nov 2007 Location: FRANCE Posts: 1,350	Good luck on this journey and thanks for having the guts to start this thread. Most importantly, get help for YOU and not for those you love and who care for you. That's the main reason you should find a solution to stop...

Jul 6th, 2009, 08:19 AM	#17
bern Sandgroper Joined: May 2007 Location: Perth, Australia Posts: 1,178	Little Tiger: Honestly your posts could have been written by me a few years ago. I also knew I wasn't an alcoholic, but I had become so used to turning to alcohol, that I didn't develop any other coping mechanisms. I guess my turning point was when I finally decided to give up cigarettes, I in turn ended up stopping drinking for 6 months because I knew that I would be tempted to light up if I had a drink in my hand. Slowly but surely I started to develop better coping mechanisms. Instead of going to the pub after work, I'd go for a walk or a swim. Little things like that. Since this time, my relationship broke up, I had a car accident, I bought my first little house (all very stressful events), and not once did I turn to alcohol and drink myself stupid. I'm very proud of myself! I had tried counselling years before, but I realise that at that stage I wasn't ready to make the changes I needed to. I still enjoy a drink, but I no longer rely on alcohol to make me feel 'better'. I applaud your courage in coming forward and realising that you need to make changes. I'm confident you'll do just fine!!

Jul 6th, 2009, 08:40 PM	#18
boxermom Member Joined: Aug 2006 Location: North Carolina Posts: 13,685	Little Tiger, seeing a counselor is a wonderful idea. I hope you find a great therapist who can help you in the areas of your life that are troubling you. It's entirely possible you can get a handle on this and learn how not to turn to any substance to feel better. Best wishes.

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