[chag]

Hi all, I am interested to see who here has had this procedure done, specifically your age. I am considering the possibility of having my daughter undergo this surgery so if anyone has done it please let me know how you have benefited and the cons as well. She is 16 and obese and I am at my very wits end in trying to help her. Believe me I have tried everything under the sun and had all the tests and scans etc. but her appetite is just too much for her, it's like a black hole sadly and it's just making all of us miserable. so we have come to the conclusion that this will be the last effort we can make for her regardless the cost. Please post your thoughts

[rileygirl]

I don't have experience personally but I have 2 friends that did in their 30s. Both were due to health reasons. One had a very bad case of diabetes and they feared she wouldn't make it to 40 had she not made huge life changes. The two are doing well now (had surgery about 2 years ago) and the changes are amazing.

I just wanted to wish you a whole lotta hugs and support for what your family is going through. I am a teacher and I feel for your daughter and you as a mom wanting the best for her.

Hang in there and I hope someone here can help. Good luck!!!

[chag]

Thank youyou're very kind

[coach4me]

A good friend had it done at 34. She was over three hundred pounds and nothing she had done for years had helped her lose any significant weight.

The recovery was difficult for her. Basically, you have to learn to eat all over again. You can only take in very small amounts of liquid at first. You have to work your way up slowly to solid foods and even then you can only eat very small amounts... if you eat too much, it comes right back up because your stomach is too small to hold it.

I hope this is something your daughter doesn't have to go through...it sounds like maybe she is an emotional eater. Have you tried therapy, maybe behavior modification therapy?

[chag]

Yes we have tried everything, nothing seems to help. She just never gets full she can eat me under the table times 3. It's like a black hole, the food just disappears and yet she is always hungry

[redney]

chag, hugs to you and your daughter.

Have the doctors tested for hormones or an overactive gland that's prompting the "never feel full" feeling? I saw a National Geographic television show on obesity and there are very rare conditions that cause people not to feel full/satiated and overeat as a result, and nothing would stop the feeling or weight gain. One woman on the show suffered from her mid-20s through her diagnosis at around age 40. After this, she was put on medication and dropped a significant amount of weight.

As for lap band surgery, a friend of mine just had it done this week. She lives halfway across the country and I haven't talked with her yet. She's in her 30s and choose to have the lap band procedure vs. gastric bypass because there is an ability to adjust/remove it in the future (? I don't know for sure).

I'm sorry, this hasn't been too helpful. Once I talk with my friend, I'll come back and post here or send you a PM.

[chag]

Hi redney yes that was all done within the last year after things just got worse and worse... She has gained so much her skin is just tearing itself to pieces to keep up nothing showed up in any of the testing and it was done more than once. So I think this is our last resort as you say there is the ability to change it later on down the road so it would be a healthy change for her to adjust as she sees fit. At the moment she is just completely unable to stop herself so I am praying this will be the fix she needs

[Sunshine]

Chag, You know I have been at Camp technique for 8 weeks now. I STRONGLY URGE you to call the owner of the program. There is a 17 year old guy that comes to our Saturday boot camps every weekend. He started with the program when he was 14, he is a vision of health now. Lots of hard work, nutirion, work, and lots of support. Erik (owner) is PHENOMONAL. If you would like the number please let me know. After 39 years of being on a different diet, strict program, I am FINALLY walking away feeling HEALTHY, LEAN, and CONFIDANT in my eating choices. I only wish I could have found this place at age 16.
Please consider this...I think it would be great for her.


Side note...they will prepare all meals for her, and teach her about her body.

[finzup]

Even if she never feels full - maybe she is eating the wrong foods? I mean if she's eating unhealthy foods, that could be the problem? If she is eating a diet rich in veggies, lean meat, and whole grains then she could really just keep eating if she's never full (unlimited veggies at least).
Is she exercising?
Have you tried to figure out how many calories a day she needs? What I mean is at what point she gains/loses weight?

I think the band surgury should be a last resort and I think that it's probably not something a 16 year old should do. You say you're at your "wits end" - -but is she? What does she think of all this? If she doesn't want to lose weight or change her eating habits, the band won't fix anything.

Does she binge eat (in secret) ?
I agree with one of the other posters -- maybe she is an emotional eater. The mind can do strange things. I am an emotional eater and when depressed/whatever, I definitely can eat and eat and keep eating. When my frame of mind is, well, healthier -- I feel full and can make good choices.
Bottom line is that she has to want to do it herself -- you can't do it for her.
Has she checked out overaters anon?

You say it's making everyone miserable - but for sure, she feels the worst. She probably needs someone to understand and she needs to know she is accepted for who she is -- fat, thin, whatever. I know that growing up I had a grandmother who was always telling me to stop eating, that i was overweight, etc. Her comments and actions did a lot of damage -- (as did the kids making fun of me at school). Bottom line -- it's not easy and even if she's not an emotional eater, she is probalby definitely feeling emotional pain over this whole thing.

Ok I'm sorry for rambling on and if I'm off the marker no offense intended. I like to ramble on :)

[chag]

No offense taken:) she has been in WW, Curves, had personal trainers still has two of them. Binge eating? No not really. Bad foods? Not as much as one would think, no. She would take a plate of home cooked food before she would take a plate of desserts. She loves to cook and is very good at it and one day dreams of being a Chef, she knows how to cook foods that are good for her. She actually doesn't eat meat only chicken at times now but that started about 3 months ago so moving into pastas and such has not been such a good thing for her.
When I say it is making everyone miserable I mean just that, everyone. Her, for being teased or looked down upon at school, kids calling her fatty and all those wonderful things kids do. For not being able to fit into the clothes that I buy her after a week or month, for going through jeans that rip because maybe the were to light weight. For really wanting to fit into the bikini she wore when she was younger. I could go on and on and on but it just makes me cry.
For me and my husband, watching our first born our very lovely and sweet kind hearted daughter slowly eat herself almost to 200 pounds now. Seeing how it affects everything she does, even from getting out of a car. To see the welts that are on her back and belly and legs that are red and swollen. It goes on forever but there is never EVER a time that I have made her feel bad about herself. Ever. I am not perfect I could stand to lose a few myself so I would never do that to someone else let alone my own daughter.
Sorry for my ramble, it is so unbelievably difficult on both sides you have no idea. My heart is just broken for her I love my girl more than anything in the world

[chag]

Sunshine it sounds like a wonderful place. My biggest problem is time, she is in 10th grade and will be going into summer school as well. So well I don't really know what to do

[Irishgal]

Chag, if she is going to have this done she has to go to a COE, Center of Excellence. I have outcome study data that clearly shows better clinical outcomes when the person has this procedure done at a COE, so if she is going to do it PM me and let's find her a COE for her surgery and aftercare.

[chag]

Is Cedar Sinai one of those?

[Irishgal]

Don't know right offhand, but I can check.

[chag]

Thats ok Irish I'll be doing all my research this weekend