'Ask Permission' or 'Seek Forgiveness'...lol

oo_let_me_see

oo_let_me_see

100% Puerto Greekan
O.G.
Dec 6, 2006
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202
#1
We have this dumb futon sitting in our bedroom that serves no purpose whatsoever and it's ugly. It was DH's couch before we were married almost 7 years ago...he paid like $200 for it. I've asked him if I could get rid of it, and he's kinda like, "we'll see..." but never commits. I don't think it's about sentimental value...it's more about him being a pack rat and thinking one day it will be useful to us! Anyhow, I have an opportunity to have a local charity pick it up while he's at work today or tomorrow, and I think I'm going to do it without asking him! Should I? lol

So in general, do YOU live by the 'ask permission' :angel: or 'seek forgiveness' :devil: rule???
 
#3
Really??? Ugh! lol

I'm normally the 'seek permission' type, but oh do I want to be done with this futon!!! :graucho: It wouldn't be a major argument or anything, I think he may just be surprised for a minute and then he'll get over it. :sweatdrop:
 
#4
I think you should ask as well. But you can put a spin on it by saying that you are donating it and it would help out a family less fortunate! My BF would fall for that...good luck!
 
#5
maybe not "ask" him, exactly, but tell him that you are taking it? that way he has some forewarning and a chance to insist you don't get rid of it beforehand, but you frame it in such a way that you are being more authoritative ("they need stuff like this at x charity, me and Bruno are going to take it by there tomorrow and donate it.")
 
#6
Aww man. I guess I don't want for him not to trust me since we have a very trusting relationship, but in my defense, he is such a pack rat and even keeps a million old car magazines, etc., and it's driving me nuts. lol (Plus I've ALWAYS asked him about each one of my bag purchases, that's more important, right. ;))
 
#7
Litigatrix said:
maybe not "ask" him, exactly, but tell him that you are taking it? that way he has some forewarning and a chance to insist you don't get rid of it beforehand, but you frame it in such a way that you are being more authoritative ("they need stuff like this at x charity, me and Bruno are going to take it by there tomorrow and donate it.")
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Good idea! I'm going to try it out, because God knows if I said, "Babe, can I give away the futon today?", he'd say, "Not right now, we'll see later." lol UGH!
 
#8
Litigatrix said:
maybe not "ask" him, exactly, but tell him that you are taking it? that way he has some forewarning and a chance to insist you don't get rid of it beforehand, but you frame it in such a way that you are being more authoritative ("they need stuff like this at x charity, me and Bruno are going to take it by there tomorrow and donate it.")
Click to expand...

I agree that is a good way to go, im usually the ask permission type but in some cases you have to go around that. This way he is aware of it, and so he wont be coming home one day and flip out to find it gone. Plus emphasis the fact that you are doing a good deed by giving it to charity.
 
#12
kbell said:
Yes - however if my husband did this to me I would be P.O. especially if it were something I wanted to keep whether he liked the item or not. For that reason I would never do that to him. Have the discussion again & make him decide now - not later.
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I know...he would never do it to me. :shame: I made an appt. for Thursday, because when I finally called the charity it was too late for today/tomorrow. So I'll have some time to spring it to him, and if he decides no, at least they can pick up the other stuff I have permission to donate. :smile:
 
#13
I think it depends on the relationship you have. If it were ME, I would seek forgiveness lol. My SO gets over things fast. Or I would call him while hes gone one day and be like "That futon is going in the trash(or wherever its going)".

Ut Oh...am I a bad influence?? lol!:whistle:
 
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