Ever dumb yourself down?

naughtymanolo

FYI I am a guy
O.G.
Apr 20, 2006
3,044
10
I have to say i often do it, esp. when i meet people for the first time. It's not really about changing myself for people and i don't want to get into that debate. It's more about doing it for me. I do it as a kind of 'disorientating technique' to people when i first meet them. Kind of like coming on too strong and it repels them. I like to have people think they are smarter than me so I am underestimated an therefore s few steps in front of them? its not really a compromise of me, its just like throw in a few blonde moments. i.e. things like how does this can opener work? or I cant get my computer to select this etc. I have friends that are what i call "brain slutty" whom always bring that part of them when they meet people. I know that people not on their psychological level dislike them as they have made comments to me. Sure once i know someone the facade is down, but is it really wrong to do? (after typing this is sounds to *****y and nasty its really not lol) does anyone here do it? btw i am a guy so its not like I'm trying to get a guy by letting him think he is the smart "alpha male."
 
I do. I'm not very obvious about it but sometimes I seriously do it to make the other person feel more comfortable with me. I do this in son's school situations, especially like when I'm meeting a lot of moms and some of them haven't even gotten through high school. I try to make it positive by dumbing myself down in an area where they are good at - something like cooking, decor or stuff like that which I'm lousy at anyway.
 
I'll change my vocabulary/language in order to relate, but I don't see that as dumbing myself down. Depending on the education level of the people I talk to (which can be anything), I find it can be hard to be understood if I don't.
 
I don't think it's wrong from what you described, are you doing it for the reason of "feeling people out"?

My mom dumbs herself down a lot, maybe way more than she should which can be annoying at times since she's real smart but she says it works for her. She'll also change her accent, the way she pronounces her words or how fast she speaks, even dropping or chopping her words up depending on who she's speaking to :wtf:
 
no I don't to this extent that I pretend I don't know how to do something - but I don't need to be a know-it-all either. I don't flaunt my educational background etc, bec in most situations it doesnt matter. I used to treat some people in the immediate family by 'upping' whatever they do but that has come back to bite me in the ass - instead of just being happy with whatever they felt the need as well to 'down' whatever I have/ did . so now no more mrs nice girl - in that particular case I do not give any consideration any more, even if I come off as the arrogant b... from he.. (hehe).

I found that here often people start speaking in a dialect in order to make others feel more comfy.... but I just can't do it. to be honest, to me being who you are is ok as long as you are friendly and down to earth and don't feel the need to put others down.
 
I do. I'm not very obvious about it but sometimes I seriously do it to make the other person feel more comfortable with me. I do this in son's school situations, especially like when I'm meeting a lot of moms and some of them haven't even gotten through high school. I try to make it positive by dumbing myself down in an area where they are good at - something like cooking, decor or stuff like that which I'm lousy at anyway.

I do this too, I think that's just having good social skills and being able to relate to all sorts of people.

Outside of the professional setting, I'm very uncomfortable when people ask me what schools I have attended. I usually mutter the answers, and then quickly switch to a new topic to avoid "you must be so smart" responses. I don't know if that counts as dumbing it down or not.
 
Is that like speaking Black English around family and friends ("It shole is hot outside! I'm fixin' to go get some ice cream!") but speaking correct English around colleagues and in professional situations ("It sure is hot outside. I'm going to get some ice cream.")? I have an aunt who calls people who do that a phony, but I know plenty of people who do it.
 
Is that like speaking Black English around family and friends ("It shole is hot outside! I'm fixin' to go get some ice cream!") but speaking correct English around colleagues and in professional situations ("It sure is hot outside. I'm going to get some ice cream.")? I have an aunt who calls people who do that a phony, but I know plenty of people who do it.

No. I don't think so. I have to change my pronunciation depending on what country I'm in - in the US, or home where British English is the norm. If I go home and speak the way I speak here I get laughed at for 'talking like an American'.
 
I don't come over all strong with people I don't know but I wouldn't say I change who or what I am. I think with me it is what you see is what you get, take it or leave it.
 
I don't think I do this. I am who I am, no apologies! But that doesn't mean I am going to spill all my credentials, experience and knowledge all out there in someone's face.

When I'm just meeting someone for the first time (non-work setting) I just keep it light.
 
Almost everyday, my new job is hell. I am basicly paid to flirt,and act ditzy to men to buy clothing. I work at a high end boutique in my local area. I really hate it,its my anti . I am a very strong minded,and well spoken person. All the girls there are sort of dumb,and ditzy. I feel like im eye candy to the creepy guys. Also my job is horrible,I deal with sexual harrasment all the time ><
I am currently looking for another job,but I cannot find one (Due to me being still 17)
 
I'll change my vocabulary/language in order to relate, but I don't see that as dumbing myself down. Depending on the education level of the people I talk to (which can be anything), I find it can be hard to be understood if I don't.


I would have to agree with you on this one. :tup:

I find I have to do this a lot in my job. This past year I worked as a substitute teacher (I'm waiting for a full-time teaching position). I sub in the junior highs (7th-8th grade) and in the high schools (9th-12th). And I do notice a need sometimes to change my vocabulary or the way I explain things based on what grade level I'm teaching that day. There's just some things you can say to 12th graders that 7th graders just wouldn't get.

^^^^But I guess that's not really related to the orginal question...sorry.
 
ummm i feel sort of stupid but im really 'blonde' ditsy alot of the time. i dont act blonde i just come out with really stupid things and its not that i dont know the answers and putting it all on its just i dont think properly!
i dont dumb myself down im just dumb anyway!
 
Almost everyday, my new job is hell. I am basicly paid to flirt,and act ditzy to men to buy clothing. I work at a high end boutique in my local area. I really hate it,its my anti . I am a very strong minded,and well spoken person. All the girls there are sort of dumb,and ditzy. I feel like im eye candy to the creepy guys. Also my job is horrible,I deal with sexual harrasment all the time ><
I am currently looking for another job,but I cannot find one (Due to me being still 17)


that sucks Jadore! hope you find something quick! Good Luck!