Will getting rid of my Balenciagas help me?

[fashion-cult]

Today my BF and I broke up

I wont go into details, but it wasnt messy - rather "mutual".

I know what you're thinking "wasnt he going to buy you a Bal bag last week... and now you've broken up?"

Well, yes. Its funny how relationships can go from one extreem to another.

Anyway, I'll get to my point.

I have rid my room, computer and shelves of any pics or reminders of him and I now have the urge to sell my Balenciaga's and I have no idea why?

Yes, he did get me my first Balenciaga, so selling "it" is understandable. But I feel like getting rid of them all.

I asked a friend for advice, and she thinks I should hold off and if I still feel like that in a month, then sell them.

My bags used to bring me a nutty happiness that nothing could break, until now. Not even my bags can cheer me up.

Should I sell my bags or hang on to them?

Do you think this feeling will pass...?

I have no idea why I feel like I want to get rid of them...

 

[siri anne]

sorry that you and your BF broke up

I am sure it's a tough time just now, and I can understand your feelings to get rid of everything, but I would hold on to your Bbags. When you are feeling better, you might regret selling them.

I do hope you feel better soon

 

[english_girl_900]

Well, I'm not an expert or anything (really not), but it sounds to me like a purge of sorts - you're feeling bad and kind of......I'm not good at explaining things, but its like you're trying to cleanse you're life of absolutely everything that reminds you of your ex, and for whatever reason your bbags are part of that. I agree with your friend - if you're not enjoying them or they're making you feel bad I would put them away somewhere, not look at them, not think about them, and just see how you feel. You've obviously been dealt a big blow and you're reacting to it - perfectly normal. Remember that, and try not to make any huge decisions for a while. If in a few weeks you still feel the same then get shot of them, but you might regret it if you do it in haste while you're still upset.

Man, that went on a bit - sorry. I hope things look better soon - *hugs*!!!

 

[Vanmiracle]

My bags used to bring me a nutty happiness that nothing could break, until now. Not even my bags can cheer me up.

Sorry for you and the feelings you have to get through. I understand that even if the bags are great that there are feelings compared with each one. I would let them go and take all the money you get for them and buy something new.
I had the same problem years ago and didn't get rid of the bad feeling every time I took something that HE bought me. I got rid of the stuff and didn't have the 24-hour sad face anymore 'cause everything I had in my hands was compared with him.

 

[bubbleliciousis]

Hey Fashion Cult, so sorry to hear about it. I totally know how you feel. I just broke up a couple of days ago and it was a 4 yr relationship and all the while he lead me to believe he was serious about it and we had a future together.

You know, when i break up, i do the same thing. i get everything together and dump it all into a box or throw it away. for me purging is definitely an accurate word. When I was in my teens and my early 20s, i would feel the same way about gifts as well. i associated the item to the giver and ex and it wouldn't be able to use it. of course, NONE of the gifts were anything like a bbag.

But over time, i've been able to separate the gift from the giver. now with the current breakup, i have some gifts from him. some i held on to for sentimental reason and i'll sell/throw those. but i have a nice designer bag from him and i think i'll be able to continue using the bad without feeling like hell. it's like this is my bag and that is my idiotic ex who strung me on. different things.

SO, i'd give it some time before getting rid of those bags. with time, the hurt and pain will lessen and maybe you'll be able to see the bbags for their beautiful selves. think about them with you at the different events in your life and maybe you'll be able to come to see them more as your bags than as his bags.
ok i hope you are doing ok. hang in there. pm me anytime if you want to vent. and if you want to get rid of your bbags, they will find a happy home with me! HEHEHEHE

 

[SiljeEmilienne]

Oh, hon! I'm sorry!! I agree with english, jusy wait it out. Put them in a closet for a while, and avoid them for a month or so. Then, if you feel the same, sell them.

Do you think it's the idea of bbags altogether that remind you of him, or just the ones you have?

Best of luck, Sweetie! (Forward for better things to come!!)

 

[fashion-cult]

Thanks for all your kind words...

Siri Anne right now I dont feel like I would regret selling them, but as you said, its a tough time so making a quick decision to sell is something I could regret.

english_girl what you said made perfect sense and I understood it competely. I think putting them away for a little while may be a good idea.

Van The thing is, he only got me my 05 Navy, and my feeling right now is to sell all of them, even the ones I got myself...

Bubble I hope that I can think of the bag as its own being, rather than a present from the ex. I know he would be devistated if I sold it, but that doesnt come into this.

I'm sorry for what happened to you. I know what you are going through. It sucks... but I know better things are coming our way!

Thanks for all the great advice and support ladies. I think I need to forget about my bags and get myself together before I start selling my stuff...

 

[fashion-cult]

Oh, hon! I'm sorry!! I agree with english, jusy wait it out. Put them in a closet for a while, and avoid them for a month or so. Then, if you feel the same, sell them.

Do you think it's the idea of bbags altogether that remind you of him, or just the ones you have?

Best of luck, Sweetie! (Forward for better things to come!!)

I think it's because I started taking an interest in them when I first met him. I used to talk about them to him ALL the time, and he was nice enough to go along with my little Balenciaga blabbing...

Then he told me he'd buy me my first Bal bag for Christmas... I then got my City and a Coin Purse myself

 

[pursendipity]

Sorry to hear this, FashionCult.
I would put them away for awhile, and then sell them later if they still don't make you happy. I'm sure you have some Bbags that would be hard to replace.
Don't worry, you WILL feel better eventually, just be good to yourself !!!

 

[seahorseinstripes]

oh girl, i'm soooo sorry to hear that
i also had a relationship trouble with my bf last year, it was going bad and sad for months, we were still unsure of what we're going to do.
that's why somewhere last year i went disappreared from the forum because i really have no interest talking about my b bags which is the only designer bags he compliment me on.

but i never lost my love on my b bags.
and u know what, when we were crying and talking about our relationships and how he missed me (we lived together for years and he's used to having my things around him too, and i moved out the minute we had the troouble), he said that he missed seeing my b bags around the house and he missed the smell of my bags, especially my dark coffee fbf which he liked so much. i was laughing the minute he said that LOL

but now we get back together, alhtough we're still taking it slow.

my opinion is :
are u sure u can't fixed the problem with him?
i think u should hold on to ur b bags for some times, wear it if u still like it, or keep it somewhere unsighted until u're sure what to do with them?
i think they're too pretty to get rid at this moment, i know you might make a rush decision now, and i think u'll might missed it when it's gone too soon.

take care u girl, and we'll always be here for you

 

[fashion-cult]

oh girl, i'm soooo sorry to hear that
i also had a relationship trouble with my bf last year, it was going bad and sad for months, we were still unsure of what we're going to do.
that's why somewhere last year i went disappreared from the forum because i really have no interest talking about my b bags which is the only designer bags he compliment me on.

but i never lost my love on my b bags.
and u know what, when we were crying and talking about our relationships and how he missed me (we lived together for years and he's used to having my things around him too, and i moved out the minute we had the troouble), he said that he missed seeing my b bags around the house and he missed the smell of my bags, especially my dark coffee fbf which he liked so much. i was laughing the minute he said that LOL

but now we get back together, alhtough we're still taking it slow.

my opinion is :
are u sure u can't fixed the problem with him?
i think u should hold on to ur b bags for some times, wear it if u still like it, or keep it somewhere unsighted until u're sure what to do with them?
i think they're too pretty to get rid at this moment, i know you might make a rush decision now, and i think u'll might missed it when it's gone too soon.

take care u girl, and we'll always be here for you

are u sure u can't fixed the problem with him?

I dont want to set myself up for disappointment or confusion, so as far as I am concerned, our relationship is finished . No idea what the future holds, but I am going to try and move on without him.

i think u should hold on to ur b bags for some times, wear it if u still like it, or keep it somewhere unsighted until u're sure what to do with them?

I dont think I'll be wearing them any time soon, but I think I will hang onto them for a bit.

i think they're too pretty to get rid at this moment, i know you might make a rush decision now, and i think u'll might missed it when it's gone too soon.

They are gorgeous bags... I do love them so much, and I dont want to regret selling them. I just feel I need to 'clean out' everything.

I think giving it some time will help.

 

[seahorseinstripes]

They are gorgeous bags... I do love them so much, and I dont want to regret selling them. I just feel I need to 'clean out' everything.

I think giving it some time will help.

so i think, the most important thing is to get the bags unsighted for some time, and find another bags you like and bought it!
i know it might sound shallow, but i find that helps.
i was soooo devastated by that time and i get a bag that i really liked, and ti actually made me feel better.
not feeling normal again yet, but feeling better

 

[fashion-cult]

Thanks for the advice... i really appreciate it

 

[bubbleliciousis]

Fashion Cult, you are a smart girl and you are smart and strong to leave since you're not getting what you need.

yes give the bbags some time. put them in a box or somewhere where they're not in your face for now. that might give help with the need to clean things out. Use a different bag. buy a non descript one for now if you need to.

give it some time and i hope that when you set eyes on your bbags again, you will feel joy and love for/from them. if you decide to sell them, at least you'll get a reasonable price and you won't end up selling them for too little $$ just to get rid of them.

Hang in there and let me know how you're doing.

Lots of

are u sure u can't fixed the problem with him?

I dont want to set myself up for disappointment or confusion, so as far as I am concerned, our relationship is finished . No idea what the future holds, but I am going to try and move on without him.

i think u should hold on to ur b bags for some times, wear it if u still like it, or keep it somewhere unsighted until u're sure what to do with them?

I dont think I'll be wearing them any time soon, but I think I will hang onto them for a bit.

i think they're too pretty to get rid at this moment, i know you might make a rush decision now, and i think u'll might missed it when it's gone too soon.

They are gorgeous bags... I do love them so much, and I dont want to regret selling them. I just feel I need to 'clean out' everything.

I think giving it some time will help.

 

[Cheshire Cat]

Oh, fashion-cult, I'm so sorry to hear about your break-up.

I can't really add much to the excellent advice already given you, but my feeling is also that you may regret getting rid of your beautiful bags if you do it now. Break-ups are really upsetting, and I've learnt not to do anything overly impulsive in the heat of things, because I can't judge the situation very well when I'm so upset. Right now you'd probably have a really hard time telling if this is just a passing fancy or if you seriously need to get rid of the bags to help you feel better.

It would be a real shame if this spoilt Bbags for you forever... so I agree with the consensus: put them away for a few weeks, or a month or two, or however long you need to calm down and look at things objectively again. I think in the end things will sort themselves out and you will be able to tell if the bad feelings are causing you to want to get rid of your Bbags or if the Bbags are causing bad feelings.