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Very bad morning! I dont know if i should be pissed

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Mar 7, 2008, 11:03am   #16
IntlSet's Avatar
IntlSet
Bonjour!
I just want to clarify that what makes her *seem* spoiled are not the material things. I actually received a BMW as my first car upon turning 16. What strikes me as spoiled is to complain about the folks who have done all these nice things for you. And not just to complain, but to do it numerous times, publically.
Mar 7, 2008, 11:04am   #17
IntlSet's Avatar
IntlSet
Bonjour!
Originally Posted by nataliam1976
Plus lets face it, the whole situation is not really our business, but she chose to post it , so all factors are relevant, her living at home as well.
I agree. This young lady has posted thrice about her parents so we know quite a bit of info. As I've learned from experience, don't post what you don't want to be discussed. Once things are out in public, people are going to comment.
Mar 7, 2008, 11:17am   #18
cakelover's Avatar
cakelover
Member
I don't think you should be upset. I know working for parents is not easy (boss vs. dad dynamic is not the same), but you have to remember that it isn't much better out in the real world either - most likely even worse.

You may think that your dad treats his paid employee 'fairer' that he treats you at work.... but of course all parents do it when their children are working for them! of course the standards for the boss's child is going to be different from the other employees! if any case, the boss' children have to work even harder to prove themselves.. how else are you going to get respect from the other employees and from your parents? If you are serious about working for them, you need to let them see you not as just a kid, but a serious, competent worker; and you are going to have to realise that the standards he measures you by are not going to be the same as for other employees
Mar 7, 2008, 11:38am   #19
GUCCI_COOCHIE's Avatar
GUCCI_COOCHIE
loves LV!
AWW, I hope you feel better, I know how it feels it mess up at work. I'm sure you felt terrible about it and didn't expect for your dad to get that mad.

Don't waste your time being mad about it, he IS your dad, and sometimes parents are harsh (esp. asian parents! I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!). I bet if it was another unrelated employee, your dad wouldn't have said half the things he said to you. He probably would have just said, "OH? Well it can be fixed, get to it! & be careful next time!"

FEEL BETTER! & try not to take it so personal next time. Everybody makes mistakes!
Mar 7, 2008, 1:25pm   #20
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risingsun
Member
I work in a psychotherapy practice. All of us have spent many years obtaining our degrees and licenses to practice. Going on a "rant" is not considered appropriate or professional behavior. Yes, such behavior does happen, but that doesn't make it acceptable.
Last edited Mar 7, 2008 at 1:29pm.
Mar 7, 2008, 1:42pm   #21
bisousx's Avatar
bisousx
Member
The scolding will probably help you to never make those mistakes again.
Mar 7, 2008, 1:58pm   #22
amanda's Avatar
amanda
I Bleed Georgia Red
Originally Posted by risingsun
I work in a psychotherapy practice. All of us have spent many years obtaining our degrees and licenses to practice. Going on a "rant" is not considered appropriate or professional behavior. Yes, such behavior does happen, but that doesn't make it acceptable.
I don't think anyone's denying or disagreeing with you that ranting at your employees is unprofessional, that's a given. In a perfect world, everyone would sit down with a cup of hot tea and have sincere discussions about how job performance can be improved. What at least I (I won't try and speak for others) am saying is that people in the professional world are often unprofessional, and that dealing effectively with unprofessional behavior is part of the big, bad world. Whether or not daddy is your boss. I've had plenty of bosses that weren't my father rant at me. And sometimes 'dealing effectively with unprofessional behavior' is something as simple as not taking it personally when your boss yells at you. Because sometimes bosses yell. Taking it personally every time you're yelled at at work is going to make a real, professional career very difficult.

In fact, I would think that the fact that her dad IS her boss would make this easier to deal with if she did want to sit down and have a conversation about her feelings. I would think that bosses who aren't emotionally invested in you would be much less likely to honor such a request.

I should know, I work in freakin' Office Space, I have like 8 bosses. And sometimes I make a mistake. And sometimes one (or all 8) lights me up for it. My ability to let it roll off my back makes me a better employee, and it's gotten me 4 raises in 2.5 years. Things like that don't go unnoticed, in my admittedly short experience.
Mar 7, 2008, 3:26pm   #23
kristie's Avatar
kristie
"H" is for horses?
Originally Posted by IntlSet
Yes, you did miss other posts. This is the third post in a short period of time complaining about her parents -- with whom she lives, and who support her. If she were independent from her parents, it would be one thing. But to live under their roof, work in their business, and obviously get some extra money from them (or else her salary is seriously inflated if she's buying designer bags AND a BMW herself) and then to complain about them seems exceptionally spoiled to me.

I don't know what kind of jobs or bosses you gals who said her dad behaved "inappropriately" have, but bosses aren't there to make you feel good about what you've done right. They will point out what you've done wrong, and they won't always coat it in sugar and spice. So in that case, no, the OP is should not be upset (this was the question she posed), she should count her blessings (parents who allow her to live with them, parents to obviously give her money, parents who employ her -- not that any of this is wrong or bad) and stop complaining.
I couldn't agree more...it seems like a lot of complaints....
Mar 7, 2008, 3:42pm   #24
Kareberry's Avatar
Kareberry
Member
Sorry your day didn't start off that well...but look on the bright side, despite having to take whatever it is your parents throw at you, they provide for you so you do not have any financial responsibilities to worry about. At our age, not having financial responsibilities is a nice thing.

I don't work for my parents but still live with them. I don't pay rent, but sometimes I take them out to nice restaurants for dinner. I think it's a matter of perspective really because if you can take the heat sometimes, the trade off of being a good daughter and having parents provide for you is truly a blessing and you'll be better off in the long run. Think about all the experience you're have doing all that you do! Next step, perhaps you could go job hunting...then if you get an offer, tell your parents and see how their attitude might change or what their thoughts are.
Mar 7, 2008, 5:12pm   #25
thelace's Avatar
thelace
Founder of B.U.M.
Seems simple to me. Get another job, leave home and rent a place of your own with accompanying bills.

Give it 6 months and you'll be running home, begging for your old job back. Would do you good actually.
Mar 7, 2008, 5:43pm   #26
claireZk's Avatar
claireZk
Member
This kind of stuff happens ALL the time when you work for a family business. It probably sounds like a sweet deal for those who haven't done it, but it's really not. When your employer is a family member they can say things to you that a normal boss couldn't say...

My take is on this situation is that the OP is an adult working at a real job and she made an honest mistake. We've all been there. But rather than discussing it with her the way a boss would discuss it with a normal employee, her father scolded her the way a parent scolds a child when they're in trouble. I think THAT is why she's frustrated....
Mar 7, 2008, 10:51pm   #27
missmustard's Avatar
missmustard
Prima Donna Assoluta
I think I would be mad too. But truth of the matter is, no "real" world job is ever gonna be a piece of cake. You just need to learn not to let it get to you so badly. I understand in your situation it's much more difficult, because after all, he is your dad; but just try and take it as experience for your future.
Mar 8, 2008, 1:06am   #28
risingsun's Avatar
risingsun
Member
Originally Posted by amanda
I don't think anyone's denying or disagreeing with you that ranting at your employees is unprofessional, that's a given. In a perfect world, everyone would sit down with a cup of hot tea and have sincere discussions about how job performance can be improved. What at least I (I won't try and speak for others) am saying is that people in the professional world are often unprofessional, and that dealing effectively with unprofessional behavior is part of the big, bad world. Whether or not daddy is your boss. I've had plenty of bosses that weren't my father rant at me. And sometimes 'dealing effectively with unprofessional behavior' is something as simple as not taking it personally when your boss yells at you. Because sometimes bosses yell. Taking it personally every time you're yelled at at work is going to make a real, professional career very difficult.

In fact, I would think that the fact that her dad IS her boss would make this easier to deal with if she did want to sit down and have a conversation about her feelings. I would think that bosses who aren't emotionally invested in you would be much less likely to honor such a request.

I should know, I work in freakin' Office Space, I have like 8 bosses. And sometimes I make a mistake. And sometimes one (or all 8) lights me up for it. My ability to let it roll off my back makes me a better employee, and it's gotten me 4 raises in 2.5 years. Things like that don't go unnoticed, in my admittedly short experience.
I don't disagree with you, Amanda. Some people can let it go. Unfortunately others can become emotionally and physically ill from a toxic workplace. I have seen too many people for therapy that have developed anxiety and depression from their work situations. Some bosses go beyond unpleasant to nasty and abusive. Being resilient on the job is a terrific attribute
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